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Parents = Non-Christians?
ilovejesusxoxo
post Oct 31 2009, 03:40 PM
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Ok well many people have probably wrote in about the same thing. I guess I've always called myself a christian, but ever since last March - April I discovered that Christianity is not just a title, and I learned what it really meant to be a christian. I got saved and surrendered my life to Christ. I was so excited, I started going to church every chance i got,(i didn't belong to one.) I bought a Bible and I started talking to my friends about Jesus and everything. Sound fine right? Wrong. My parents say that they are Christians, but they don't really live Christian based lives. They get annoyed when i ask them questions about God and it is like my favorite thing to talk about. Even though they listen and answer my questions, I feel they are just tolerating it. It's almost like a disgust. My mom een said before she was afraid I was taking on cult-like behaviors. It's the same thing with my friends. They do things I don't respect, things I won't do, they offend me sometimes with the things they do, and they just tolerate it when I talk about Jesus. Basically they roll their eyes if I say I won't do something, because it doesn't honor God. I guess my question is how can I live with Christian values when the closest peope around me are so wordly? And how can I talk to them about Jesus without sounding critical and judgemental? How can I get them to get saved? I don't know if I should just get new friends, because I feel like I can lead them to Christ. Am I kidding myself? Am I still trying to hold on to friends who are a bad influence? What about my parents? Please, Help! smile.gif
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Stevo
post Oct 31 2009, 03:49 PM
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That's hawt.
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buy an audio recording of the bible and play it on your parents bed stand while they sleep. when they wake up, theyll be super christians.

that or you can always chat with someone here and find out if you actually are a little over the top
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horsesforlife
post Oct 31 2009, 04:34 PM
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My parents can be the same way sometimes, some people are more devout than others are I guess.
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opalecent
post Oct 31 2009, 06:02 PM
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I totally understand as far as the paretns thing goes. I grew up Christian, butmy family doesn't do a lot of thigns that you'd consider Christian. my mom is totally against what she sees as 'over-conservative' but what I see as following God's law out of love. She doesn't get that you can follow God's law without being a 'legalist.' >.<

As for friends, I attend a christian school, but even then there are challenges.
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Unconservative C...
post Oct 31 2009, 06:58 PM
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If people don't want to hear what you have to say, then you shouldn't say it to them.

Obviously your friends don't want to hear about your religion, and you have to learn to respect that. I love talking about hockey and wrestling, but that doesn't mean I am going to tell people that aren't interested in those things about it.
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fm107
post Oct 31 2009, 07:36 PM
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Hi ilovejesusxoxo,

From what you have said about your parents response to your questions, I am left wondering if they really are saved. Someone who is saved should delight in talking about God where as someone who is not saved often feels uncomfortable about it.

Your friends sound like they are in the same boat.

Let's take a look at scripture:

James 2:19
You believe that there is one God. Good! Even the demons believe that—and shudder.


Even the demons believe in God, but that alone does not save a person.

James 2:20
You foolish man, do you want evidence that faith without deeds is useless
?

A person must change from their old lives of sin into a life of righteousness. This is also in accord with:

2 Corinthians 5:17
Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come!


As it says in scripture:

Matthew 7:17-20
Likewise every good tree bears good fruit, but a bad tree bears bad fruit. A good tree cannot bear bad fruit, and a bad tree cannot bear good fruit. Every tree that does not bear good fruit is cut down and thrown into the fire. Thus, by their fruit you will recognize them.


We know what fruits to look for:


Galations 5:19-26
The acts of the sinful nature are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity and debauchery; idolatry and witchcraft; hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions and envy; drunkenness, orgies, and the like. I warn you, as I did before, that those who live like this will not inherit the kingdom of God.

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law. Those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the sinful nature with its passions and desires. Since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit. Let us not become conceited, provoking and envying each other.


May be God is using you to save your friends. One thing to watchful of is this: they will not rise to your level but you may sink down to theirs. Protect your testimony and pray. Should they be an influence then you shouldn't put yourself in a position where you may be tempted to sin.

With regards to your parents, keep asking them questions - it may strike a cord.

Remember, you are a light in a world full of darkness. Pray.
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scguitar
post Nov 2 2009, 12:11 AM
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When you think about it really, people just want to believe in Christ but nobody wants to act like him.

Talk to your parents, be like "why do you seem annoyed when I talk to you about this" or something like that
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-vida-
post Nov 2 2009, 12:08 PM
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lool, when you first give your life to christ, (or again) lol, it's suchhh an overwhelming feeling, you wanna shout to the world his name. You tell everyone around you, everyone you care for, anyone! and then when you realize no one really wants to listen (or certain people) something starts to die, you still want to save them and you try you're hardest, you try and you try again, but nothing get's through. You start to realize that they can't see what you see, they don't really understand what you're talking about, and some just don't really care! and it get's so frustrating, and you love them so much you don't want to see them fall, or end up the wrong way, and you know all they need is God for their struggles, their pain, for everything. But they can't see it, they are still in the darkness of this world, and only the word of God can bring them to the light, I learned that only God knows how to get your attention, anyone's attention, and whatever is meant to be will be. I'm not sure I still try to reach out to people, but there's so much criticism and negativity you just don't wanna tell those people again, but because their my friends, I'm trying to wait till when they need my advice, or when they're really down or depressed, when they need a help in hand, then you tell them about jesus =) lool or tryyy, maybe because of their situation they might actually try to understand, it's nice to know there's someone who cares so unconditionally about you, so it might work, I dunno, I haven't gotten to try yet, I'm going to though. But I'd say again all you can do is have faith and pray that God will show you're friends and family his word and his light. Sometimes God will change around your whole situation just because of you, so keep believing and praying and build your relationship with God so that you can have a proper understanding with him. He will show you things =).
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opalecent
post Nov 3 2009, 12:34 AM
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Just feel like adding this one last thing:

Instead of preaching to them with your words,
show them with your actions what a loving Christian is like, what true joy is like, what true peace is like
They will wonder what is different about you.
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tryin2live4chris...
post Nov 3 2009, 01:27 PM
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Girl, this is a scenario that many of us know all too well. My guess is to keep praying for your parents and find some strong Christian friends your age who love Jesus as much as you do. AT this point in your life you might have to make your church family your 'family' if you know what i mean. If that doesn't work for you, you can always pm me and we can become fast friends b/c I love to talk about Jesus all day any day!! tongue.gif I'll keep praying for you and I hope this helps. !!
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Hessmix
post Nov 3 2009, 02:36 PM
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QUOTE (Unconservative Christian @ Oct 31 2009, 03:58 PM) *
If people don't want to hear what you have to say, then you shouldn't say it to them.

Obviously your friends don't want to hear about your religion, and you have to learn to respect that. I love talking about hockey and wrestling, but that doesn't mean I am going to tell people that aren't interested in those things about it.


I'm sorry but that's a horribly awful excessive-tolerant view.




You should always try and express your faith, even if not openly. Just acting as a proper Christian should act and be quick to forgive is even enough. For family you should always be on the best behavior and even go above and beyond your duties as just a child of your parents. Show them the utmost respect.

For friends, just be what you are the best friend you can be. Opportunities will show themselves. Also remember its not your duty to convert, or change people's behavior. Land the groundwork and plant the seed of Jesus and God will do the rest.
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blackswan41
post Nov 8 2009, 05:19 PM
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QUOTE (ilovejesusxoxo @ Oct 31 2009, 02:40 PM) *
My parents say that they are Christians, but they don't really live Christian based lives. They get annoyed when i ask them questions about God and it is like my favorite thing to talk about. Even though they listen and answer my questions, I feel they are just tolerating it. It's almost like a disgust.

I am so sorry that your parents seem unable to support you in your faith walk as they are called to do by God. Chances are they are "limited" in some manner from connecting with God due to some past pain or experience. That's what happened at my home growing up anyway.

Don't ever, ever give up on the power of prayer and a gracious attitude. My parents are nearing their "twilight" years and they are slowly coming around to support me and ask me questions about my faith which granted is kinda odd as I'm the kid and they're the parent.

No matter. God uses those who are open and willing. Take your job of spreading God's love seriously and you will be amazed before you are half way through. In some ways "stuck" adults count on young people to give them a little inspiration. I know Ive gotten plenty of that here on CTF.
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rokcndy
post Nov 8 2009, 07:44 PM
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I agree with opalescent ^ ^

Work on improving your relationship with Christ instead of other peoples'. Show them your hard work and your compassion, but don't preach at them because you never know what Christ has intended for them, so leave it to Him. Pray for them and ask God to fill them with His love, and when they come to you for spiritual guidance, definately show them your devotion by sharing your relationship with God.

hope this helps ^ ^
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Miller821
post Nov 9 2009, 06:16 PM
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QUOTE (ilovejesusxoxo @ Oct 31 2009, 02:40 PM) *
How can I get them to get saved? I don't know if I should just get new friends, because I feel like I can lead them to Christ. Am I kidding myself? Am I still trying to hold on to friends who are a bad influence? What about my parents? Please, Help! smile.gif


"I have but one candle of life to burn, and I would rather burn it out in a land filled with darkness then a land flooded with light." John Falconer

Don't give up on them... Show them the true meaning of Christ.
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HaleyGirl16
post Nov 9 2009, 06:22 PM
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QUOTE (ilovejesusxoxo @ Oct 31 2009, 03:40 PM) *
Ok well many people have probably wrote in about the same thing. I guess I've always called myself a christian, but ever since last March - April I discovered that Christianity is not just a title, and I learned what it really meant to be a christian. I got saved and surrendered my life to Christ. I was so excited, I started going to church every chance i got,(i didn't belong to one.) I bought a Bible and I started talking to my friends about Jesus and everything. Sound fine right? Wrong. My parents say that they are Christians, but they don't really live Christian based lives. They get annoyed when i ask them questions about God and it is like my favorite thing to talk about. Even though they listen and answer my questions, I feel they are just tolerating it. It's almost like a disgust. My mom een said before she was afraid I was taking on cult-like behaviors. It's the same thing with my friends. They do things I don't respect, things I won't do, they offend me sometimes with the things they do, and they just tolerate it when I talk about Jesus. Basically they roll their eyes if I say I won't do something, because it doesn't honor God. I guess my question is how can I live with Christian values when the closest peope around me are so wordly? And how can I talk to them about Jesus without sounding critical and judgemental? How can I get them to get saved? I don't know if I should just get new friends, because I feel like I can lead them to Christ. Am I kidding myself? Am I still trying to hold on to friends who are a bad influence? What about my parents? Please, Help! smile.gif


First of all congrats on getting saved. That is wonderful. Ok i cant say i know where your are coming from with the parents thing cuz my whole family goes to church. But i do know what you mean with the friends thing. I deal with the same thing. Chances are that all Christians go through the same thing. You asked if you were trying to hold on to friends who are a bad influence. After reading all of your msg i dont think you are. I think you realize, even subconsciously, that you all have grown apart since you got saved. I think that you are hanging out with them more bcuz you know if they will give u the chance you can reach them than bcuz you are close friends. (And btw im not trying to judge by saying that im just going by what happened to me when i got saved.) Honestly i think that you would be better to have your current "friends" as aquantences (srry its spelled wrong tongue.gif) and find some friends that are genuine Christians trying to live and stand for the same things you believe in and that you know have your back when you talk to lost or backslid friends about God. Do you have Fellowship of Christian Athletes (FCA) @ your school? If so, most schools open it up beyond just atheletes to everyone who wants to join it. That is a gr8 place to meet other Christian teenagers that will have your back in your faith and who will pray for your parents and friends. Trust me, i know, Im an officer at the FCA at my high school. You would definately fit in at ours lol. Dont worry there are Christian friends out there. It may take a lil bit to find them but if you pray and look for them you will find them.

As for your parents, all i know to tell you there is pray hard, i will 2, and keep talkin 2 them every chance you get. I go to church with a 10 and 13 yr old who every time they came to church they requested prayer for there mom and dad. They also went to the alter and prayed for them there selves. There mom is now saved and in church. There dad is saved, sober, and a preacher. And it didnt stop there. There aunts, uncles, and grandparents all got saved and attend church somewhere. All because of the faith of 2 kids. And dont expect immediate results. It will happen in God's time. My pastor prayed for his mom for 20 years before she finally gave her heart 2 God. I will pray for your situation. If you ever need to talk or need advice im a missionary and i will be more than happy to help. PM me anytime.

1eye.gif
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