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Posts posted by Buoyancy

  1. Ah, yes. The dry seasons. 

    No one teaches new believers about those. NO. ONE. and they happen. The "romance" of being saved ends when you realize how crappy the world is, how bad people who call themselves Christians can be, how nothing ends up in your favor, how evil seems to be winning, how "If God is good why am I single/ugly/lonely /why is the world: evil, cruel, hateful..." etc, etc.

    I get it. 

    Thing is, God isn't those legalistic church people who take verses out of context. God isn't that "holier than thou" NO TOUCHY OPPOSITE SEX college. Which, again, is legalism and if you try other areas, you will find that in pockets. Not all Christians share that sentiment. I have been a believer for 20 years and I do hug my male friends and go to the movies with them, and I've even been clothes shopping a few times with them.  

     Christianity is so much than Jeremiah 29:11 taken out of context or a chrome fish on a car.  It's not a get rich quick scheme or a way to get babes and degrees.  You have to have a relationship with God to get to heart of Christianity, because He IS at the center of it. You have to know him and his principles and his Son.  You can't just read 2 Bible verses, attend church twice and expect everything in the world to be okay. Having communion with God will make everything in your world FEEL okay, or doable at least, even if it's not actually okay. You do eventually find peace. and may fall out of peace, but there's the beauty of being human. :P  

    "Christian life is dull"? Yeah, okay. Try getting fired from your dream job a week before rent is due when you're broke in the first place.  Try following the Lord to some new scary place where you don't know a soul while driving a 20 year old car. Try moving across the country because God told your parents to. Try losing friends because of your faith. Try being at the end of you rope with a suicide plot in place only to have someone step in at the last minute to stop you. Try learning about yourself in darkest hours. Try watching the world, your world, fall apart in front of your eyes but you feel peace regardless. If the Christian life is dull for you, you're probably doing something wrong. Or you haven't been doing it long enough.

    As for religion, James 1:27 says this "Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world." That's it. It doesn't have a list of rules. "Do justly, love mercy, walk humbly with your God" are the basics.  It doesn't require 5 prayers a day. As you become closer to God, you learn more and you start living the standards the Bible sets, such as fleeing immorality and not wanting your neighbor's stuff.  It's not something you just go cold turkey from one lifestyle to another. It's a gradual change of heart. 

    As for downloading the app, wonderful! Kudos for not giving up totally. I suggest Psalms, Proverbs or the Gospels (Matthew, Mark, Luke John) as starters.  I'd also suggest implementing prayer. I talk to God for 5 miles of my commute every day. It's not a bunch but it helps. You could start with praying for 3 minutes and work your way up. 

    If you'd like some advice, I say stop comparing your life to others.  You will always see their grass as greener. ALWAYS.  I do this myself. I've been praying for a spouse for a long time and when I see my younger friends dating and getting married, I tend to go "Why NOT me God?" or even "Yo, you can do anything, why didn't you make me hot like her? Or rich like him? What is wrong with you? Why did you make me this way?"  or I see happy families and  start  off with "Okay, Mr. Perfection, why is her dad killin' it and my dad was an abuser? Why does she get to thrive and I got nothing but pain?"  and it does turn into a more PG version of what you said earlier. " You're mean, God and I hate you because you haven't blessed me in X Y Z ways!!" 

    The lack of comparison will not only impact your faith, but your mental health as well.  Change your perspective from comparison to gratitude and watch yourself change. Be thankful for that toilet, food you can eat, a roof over your head, clothes you like.  Don't let the fact your neighbor has a Lambo and you have a Civic convince your life is terrible and God is awful.  Material goods are not an indicator of anything long lasting. 

  2. On 1/5/2019 at 1:52 AM, Lucian Hodoboc said:

    How did that happen? :o

    By sheer...


    hah. hahaha.

    that's his username.

    I'm sorry. XD Will and I were struggling with the fact that this place was dying so ungraciously, so, he talked to Cary during the summer, got some rights and here we are.


  3. On 11/18/2018 at 11:56 PM, Chris-M said:


    Post removed by Admin - not appropriate content for debate forum

    I work in a public school. I can't exactly wallop some students over the head and holler THE POWER OF CHRIST COMPELS YOU (I'll admit, a few need it.) or whip out my Bible like some kind of street preacher and yell from a soapbox. 

     I do work with social outcasts though. Deaf and hard of hearing kids typically are behind socially in the mainstream setting.

    What I CAN do is pray about to proceed in sticky situations, how I can encourage these kiddos in ways they may not get at home or other ways I can support them These schools are a pretty dark place. If I can be some sort of light, reflecting Jesus to those who'd otherwise never see him, my mission is accomplished. 

    Outside of school if someone asks, I'll witness to them, sure. Trying to get bolder, not there yet. Hence my comment about trying to emulate Christlike behavior.

    I still see the entire "guilt" argument from the perspective of giving someone advice. If they don't follow it, why should I feel guilty? Bad for their poor decision making skills,? Yes. Guilty? Nah.  I know the repercussions of not choosing Jesus are a million times more severe but, same concept. 

    And yes, I love my neighbor as myself. :P

  4. The Bible makes it pretty clear. 

    You don't accept Jesus after being presented  with the gospel. You go to hell.  Actions have consequences. 

    Those who haven't heard... I'm not sure about them...

    but comfortable? Yeah, You accept Jesus and live for him, you get heaven. You don't? You don't. It's not rocket science, nor am I gonna guilt trip myself over it. But if you're feeling guilty over all of those lost souls, I hope you're doing what you can to be a witness and point people towards Christ.  This is the behavior I'm striving for. 

  5. On 10/29/2018 at 8:24 AM, rruddyy said:

    Reuben, gad, Asher, Zabulun, Dan and Naphtali, must stand on mount Ebal to announce the curses. anyone will be cursed who secretly set up and idol, because the lord hates 'idols?'


    Cool story, bro. 

  6. Define... celebrate. 

    I go to costume parties because it's fun. They just happen around Halloween. If they were in any other month, I'd still go. :P

     All Hallows Eve is a way to celebrate the dead for some, other people believe it is when the spiritual and physical realm are closest and  wanna... talk to ghosts? ( I am unsure as I believe you should just leave dead people alone. Saul in the OT yelled at some dude for waking him up.) The holiday has Pagan origins brought over from Ireland, granted, our modern Christmas has pagan origins from South America... so.. y'know...

    What bothers me is the fear factor. "For the Lord has not given us a spirit of fear" and part of Halloween feeds off of fear. Skeletons, morbid images of death, fake blood, monsters and stuff... not exactly Christ-like things.
    The other bit is greed.  Kids running around hassling people for candy, comparing how much candy they got, which house gives out the best candy, the most candy, how much candy can I consume without my parents noticing.

    While there are worse activities out there, I don't think Halloween is optimal.  I wouldn't call it WRONG, but I wouldn't call it right either. If you wanna hit up a costume party and gorge on individually wrapped Snickers bars go for it. 
    You wanna make some kid pee himself by popping out of a grave? Eh, then I question your interest in said holiday. 

  7. I like doing Christian fiction two ways.

    1. The Christian theme is subtle, interwoven in a story told by characters who may or may not be followers of Christianity. The message is there and pokes through in the plot,  morality/goals of the characters and treatment of others.  

    2. The faith (or lackthereof) is direct, in the reader's face and they watch the protag come to terms with belief, or watch them grow in faith after almost giving up. 


    It all depends on the sort of tale to tell. Some go the route of Christian protag who has obstacles and scenarios to overcome. Some go subtle, some go bold. 

  8. On 10/7/2018 at 10:10 PM, strongfaithfulgirl said:

    Thanks for welcoming me :) Cool we're almost the same age! I love writing stories and poems. 

    Of course!
    Yeahhh... i've been here a loooooong time. 
    What genre? I write action novels.


    Hi, I'm Becky, I'm 27. They keep around because the teenagers need a little extra common sense provided. :P

    Oooh... writing... what do you like to write?

    Welcome to the forums.  

  10. She's only your step mom if they're married. Otherwise, she's just your father's girlfriend.

    Your statement... "are Colombian women good for marriage?" sounds kind of...off?  Kind of demeaning and dehumanizing. I feel like you're asking questions about an Amazon Alexa or an iphoneX instead of a human.
     I mean,  some POC suck at marriage, some...er... many white people aren't fit for marriage (or having kids for that matter, I'm looking at you, all the Honda Odyssey soccer mom's named Karen or Sharon). What does someone's home country have anything to do with it? It boils down to the person. 

  11. And I believe in my heart I should consume as many tacos as I want. Alas, I have a dairy allergy. :P

    Stuff from God is stuff you just know, it's a feeling, but it creeps into your head too, it's stronger. Feelings can lie. Be wary that you are praying for God's direction, not just wishing for you guys to come together under the guise of prayer. That route leads to disappointment. Trust me. I tried it many many times in my teen years. 

    Finality and closure when dealing with these emotions takes time. Like I said before, it's not easy but in your case I think it would be worthwhile to back off a little in the romance department. You could pray for your future spouse in general and leave this girl's name out of said prayers.  You don't have to go "cold turkey" on the friendship, but you can give yourself a  little space so your judgment isn't clouded.  For example, if you hang out 3 days a week, back off to one. Respond to texts slower, stuff like that. 


    I guess? I personally am suspicious of this girl who says she'd prefer to date you but is still with your BFF. That's shady as all get out, in my opinion. I've SEEN girls pull that mess just to screw with dudes and it's so not cool.

  12. it's cool lol.



    Dan and I tried that. 4 months of no talking and we kinda crawled back to each like "I uh... I miss talking to you." We rebuilt from there. We have a pretty awesome friendship now. It can be done.


    If her touchy-feely-ness bothers you, set up boundaries. Like no touching the back or the shoulder, only high fives, no hugs over 3 seconds or something to that effect. Figure out what works for you. I am a touchy feely human as well and if someone doesn't like me touching them somewhere or doesn't want to be touched, respect it and move on. 

    If she likes you "the most", why the frick is she with your bestie?! As a female, these actions do not match up. Is she just dating him to be dating somebody? In an attempt to be close to you?  It comes across as fishy to me. I'd never go for the dude's best friend, I'm after who I'm after.  Most girls I know, except for the shady ones would agree.


    I wouldn't. You'll find yourself waiting for Gem when Diamond or Ruby comes up behind you, sees you're infatuated with another and goes on. The cycle will just repeat itself.  Get over your feelings (which can be difficult) and carry on. If things change, great! if not, fine! You'll be alright. Things WILL work out some way or another.  You're young, no rush man, no rush.

  13. 20 hours ago, lucious said:

    This is a complicated and drawn out story, so bear with me.

    Last year, I moved and began my first year at a new high school as a junior.

    • Enter neighbor. A homeschooled neighbor girl invited me to the state fair as we were settling in to our house. This was my first really experience with a girl, I was excited and thought gee maybe someone likes me. She invited me to something again a week later... then another week passes and we did something else. Then I find out she has a boyfriend. Yay. We pretty much lose contact for a few months and we rarely talk or hang out. She invites me to a movie sometime in the spring, and we begin to watch a movie almost every week for about a month and a half since we both had Movie Pass. Anyways, I finally think something is happening. I don't really know why I like her other than the attention I'm getting from her, but it's enough to woo me over. I ask her out to prom and she says yes... later she clarifies if it's as friends or date, I suggest date and she agrees. It goes well. Then things go south. She ignores me and doesn't want to hang out anymore. Cool. Then suddenly we start hanging out a bit again. Then while I'm at work I go on Instagram and find she posted pictures of her and a new boyfriend at the state fair. (one full year has now passed) Gee that's terrific. She never said anything to me. I pretty much sever ties with her and we don't talk much anymore. I tried to explain to her that I was hurt but I don't think she fully understands. Anyways so that's great. I feel terrible and just feel forever alone at this point. This was about a month or two ago.
    • Enter girl. During the whole last year, this one girl really liked me. Like really liked me. We went to homecoming and she asked me to Sades but I had come up with an excuse to not go. I kind of realized she liked me but didn't think much of it and was trying not to hurt her by getting her hopes up. Unfortunately I was too infatuated with neighbor to really notice and process it. Long and the short of it is, we get along really well. When neighbor girl was over and I came out of my bubble, I realized what was right there in front of me. I truly can see spending my life with her.
    • Enter best friend. I've been friends with him since the third grade. We've shared so many great experiences and are truly best friends and have each other's backs. We've talked about girls and how we must acquire a treasured girlfriend. He liked a different girl, girl #2 for clarification but she's mostly irrelevant, and asked her to prom, almost entirely during the same time as I liked neighbor girl.

    Best friend suddenly likes girl. At Sades, when girl asked me, she then asked best friend as an alternative. Girl never considered liking best friend. Best friend says he likes her, she says she does not. 

    Beginning of August, about a week or two before neighbor girl posts pics of boyfriend at fair, best friend tells me he really likes girl. At the time I still liked neighbor girl, so I said go for it. He asks and she says yes, so they become a thing... Soon having their first kiss and he's actually now going with her on a family vacation to Hawaii in November...

    At this time I fully realize how big of a mistake the last year had been. When I lost both my neighbor and then now girl, I realized what a fool I had been. Jealousy perhaps, although I think I've ruled that out. I realize I care for girl far more than I realized, to the point of loving her, and I'm scared of losing her.

    So now, I like girl. Girl still shares feelings for me, and said that she would emotionally chose me over my friend. My best friend knows I like her and essentially says there's always another girl.

    It's so easy to say that when you have a beautiful girlfriend ready to cuddle with you.

    So basically, at this point, it's incredibly difficult for me to hang out when both my friend and girl are together. As it makes me realize I wasted a year pursuing nothing when a shining jewel was chasing behind me. I feel awful and it's hurting my relationship with both. I find it difficult to be friends with girl, simply because we have mutual feelings and I don't know how safe it is to be friends and I don't really know how to just be friends with a girl I like. It's also obviously caused some tension with my friend.

    Even if girl and I were to be together, likely it would ruin relationship with my friend unless he is the one who breaks up.



    So. Thank you for taking the time to read and hopefully understand my story... My question is, how do I proceed? Who is right? Can I still be friends with girl? How do I know what God wants?

    Also any words of sympathy, or rebuke, would be appreciated as this is a hard and confusing time for me right now.

    The first girl  is about as useful to you as wilted lettuce.  Do yourself a favor and move on.  If she can’t understand that her actions caused you pain, then she is not good for you. A decent human would apologize.


    Next time you have a long story, please name people with fake names. I’m getting confused. :P

    As for the missing the signs, you live and you learn. Many people DO NOT MEET THEIR SPOUSE IN THE TEEN YEARS. Despite the rampant hormones, the social pressure, the unrealistic expectations Disney movies have placed on us, amongst a myriad of other factors, such as your brain changing dramatically between age 15 and age 22, many people who get into long term relationships as teens do not keep these relationships into adulthood. Something to keep in mind as a kid who seems to have marriage aspirations.


    I must ask. How much do you REALLY care about her? From what I’m reading, this sounds kind of like you’re jealous of who your friend has and mad at your mistakes. Which is a totally normal reaction, it just doesn’t sound much like love. True love is selfless and would put the wants of the other human first.

    Kind of a convoluted example from my own life, but here goes.

    I have a guy friend, let’s call him Dan. Dan and I have been friends since were teenagers.  He was my type and talking to him made me happy (still does!). We tried dating in our early 20’s but we were both too dense and desperate for romance for it to be a lasting relationship. He called it off. Long story short, we’re both still really good friends. We have a deep connection and can talk to each other about basically anything. He’s helped me when I’ve been depressed, I’ve encouraged him when he’s been down in the dumps. We’re both single and I’m not gonna lie, I have some feelings for the dude. He’s caring, compassionate, has the right balance of emotion and logic…

    But Dan doesn’t like Becky.  Not like that. I’ve been called his best friend, his sister, “bud”.  He also likes one our mutual friends currently (not that she’s aware of it to my knowledge.)

    Which, stings, I’ll admit, but I respect Dan. I respect him and his feelings and choices more than I want to fulfill my wants.  I love him in that I want the absolute best for him and if the absolute best for him isn’t me right now or me ever, I still want that for him. 



    Emotionally choose you? What’s that mean? Also if she’s going to play around with hearts and boys, this is a pattern that could follow her until adulthood. Would you want to date someone who’d dump someone else so easily? What if you get on the receiving end of that? Ouch, man.



    Being friends with people you like?... just be friendly. Don’t kiss them, keep hugs to a minimum, if your feelings are strong, always hang out in group company, don’t be alone.  But since she likes you back… I’d play it safe and just not mess with that flame. You or someone else is going to get hurt even worse if you interfere with this relationship between your bro and the lady.  


    If you wish to be friends with one or either of these individuals, you have to work through your feelings. You have to move on with the dreams of romance.


    You proceed day by day. Not feeling like talking to these two? Keep convos to a minimum.

    Feeling friendly? Say hi!


    As for what God wants, ask him! Communicate with him and you’ll get answers or things will happen so your next move becomes clear.

  14. I have read hundreds of books.

    My favorites are the Maximum Ride Series, James Rollins Sigma Force Novels, anything by Frank Peretti.

    The worst book I ever read I've forgotten the title of, but it was a beauty and the beast re-write where the beast was a tiger and .... it was basically bestiality. Written for teenagers. Under the disguise of romance.It was gross.