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the sick

Guys Forum Access (Ages 16+)
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About the sick

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    Getting The Hang Of Things

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    Male

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    Student
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  1. the sick

    Regaining Faith

    I don't know if this is any help, but look at "the other side" (atheists). They don't understand anything, life is pointless, they don't have values. They are lost. If they have nothing and God has answers and common sense, it should kind of be obvious which side to be on. If you have a question about anything specific, feel free to message me. This is just how I know I'm always on the right side and having a relationship with God is the smart thing to do.
  2. I believe in God, and probably won't ever stop. I'm a Christian Protestant, and have been for years. My problem is that while I believe in God, I believe Jesus died for our sins, and accept Him as my Lord and Savior, I don't really care. I actively dislike church, I dislike churchgoers, and I dislike the Christian lifestyle. I also have jealousy of other people for their health, their wealth, their successes, their physical looks, etc. and blame God for giving me nothing. I understand that I don't live in Haiti, Ethiopia, etc. where I don't have a toilet or clean water, and I'm thankful. But for someone who lives in the United States and deals with problems such as what I noted in the previous sentence, I just blame God for everything and can't get over it. For months, I'll say "**** you, God," or "**** God," or something similar. I think about the people I have met since I became an active Christian again about 4 years ago (after a lifetime of believing but not bothering or anything) and how many issues I have with them. Most of the people I have met at church are people that I dislike for various reasons. In their defense, I'm not a really nice/good person (I'm very blunt and dislike even perceived weakness if I think it's dumb). However, this is where I am now. I just don't want anything to do with church or church people, but at the same time, I understand church and God are good for me. I remember an argument for atheists and how they think it's unfair God is basically sending them to hell for not believing. The answer to it was, "Well, you are alive now and you dislike church, you dislike the ten commandments, you dislike worship and prayer. Heaven is full of that, and everything to glorify God. If you don't want it now, why are you complaining about not experiencing it for the rest of eternity/in the afterlife?" But yet, here I am. I can only think of people I dislike and the way none of us see eye-to-eye on things. I think of the dullness of Christian life, the stupid rules (e.x. a local Christian college forbids men and women from sitting together at lunch, or going out to see a movie), and the general stupidity I see such as faith healing (it doesn't cure cancer), the old-fashioned adults who try bossing the younger churchgoers around because the Bible says to respect your elders, and just nothing really good. I had this problem, sort of, a few years ago. I remember a girl (who is now an ex-Christian, I believe) saying that I was judging God and my relationship with Him based on other people, i.e. imperfect beings who didn't have a thing to do with God's greatness or my relationship with Him. But everything combined from the people I know/have met, the way I think I'm getting the short stick in life, and the lifestyle we're expected to lead just make me dislike it all completely. I believe in God, but I'm not practicing the religion anymore. My relationship with Him is weak if it even exists anymore, and again, I know that's bad. But what can I do to strengthen it? I opened a new Bible app on my phone last night, but I didn't know where to start. I was hoping someone here could point me to some Bible verses/stories/parables/books concerning this that could hopefully help, but after writing all of this out, I'll take pretty much any advice you guys can give. I just wanted friends, a girlfriend, success with my college degree, and generally a good life, but I've never had it. If I give up religion completely (and possibly political views although that is highly unlikely), I would probably get the first two and maybe the last. But I don't want to trade eternity in Heaven for a few good decades on earth and then the rest of forever in Hell.
  3. the sick

    Should I tell my crush that I love her?

    Okay. I won't tell her how I feel. However, it's come to my attention that she believes in doing things the old fashioned way in that she believes the guy should ask the girl out. I was thinking that perhaps what I perceive to be a lack of interest is more of her not waiting for me to ask her out. On the other hand, I could be correct and she simply isn't interested in me. So it's also occurred to me that she has a "list" of requirements that a man can't break in order for her to consider dating them. Would it be bad for me to ask if I've broken any rules on that list? Or what she would want from me in order to date me? I hear desperation is a turn-off, but we're both desperate people. I'd like to know so that I could see if her wants are something I can fulfill. I'm willing to change myself. I'm a crappy person as it is so please don't say that I need to just be myself. I asked a really hot (girl) friend a few years ago what I am on a scale from 1-10. Setting other people discuss ratings online I have learned what a true 1 is, so I understand that I'm at least a 3 or 4.Edit: Some people here missed my the point of my original post. I've shown interest in her. She knows I like her. This isn't me coming out as a friend who secretly loves her. She knows I have a crush already, just not that I love her.
  4. So I'm a 23 year old guy and I love a girl I've known since December (20 years old). I told her that I have a crush on her a while back and we've been okay since then although we aren't together in any way. Just friends. But I want to tell her how I feel since because I want her to know. The problem is that I know she is interested in someone else although she can't gather the courage to talk to the guy. I don't want her to be uncomfortable or to think I'm asking her out. I just want her to know because I hate keeping it a secret. But I'm very unattractive (4/10 according to most women) and I don't want to risk offending, upsetting, or discomforting her. Do you guys think she'd feel this way? She's super sweet and very strong in her faith. For what it's worth, she seems to believe that if you love someone then you should tell them based on a tweet she retweeted a few weeks ago. Not sure if she truly believes it, though. But is just letting her know this bad?
  5. the sick

    Online University

    You won't learn through online classes like you would in an actual classroom. I take online classes when I have to or when I just want to get through a class easily (pay someone to do it for me).
  6. the sick

    Is My Best Friend a Lesbian?

    Honestly I would start hanging out with her less. Anyone who is into anime that bad is not a good influence. At the very least stand up to her and say you don't want to cosplay as a romantic interest or pay money to go to Comic-Con or get any wigs or anything. I used to hang out with a lot of people like this and they would be better off dead in my opinion.
  7. the sick

    What's your fav. Tv Show?

    For me my favorite TV shows are Breaking Bad and DragonBall Z. Top quality entertainment. I guess Law & Order: Special Victims Unit and Family Guy are third and fourth. Maybe The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air fits in there too somewhere. What can I say? I enjoy the finer things in life.
  8. I know you posted this almost a month ago but I just want to say that I feel exactly the same way you do. I go to a college/young adults group at my church and there I am just a wallflower. About five or six of them went to church together probably since middle or high school and are close friends. They hang out together and go to the movies, swingdancing, and other fun things. But me? Nothing. They don't really even talk to me unless I say hi first. I used to love going to the group and being with everyone, but then I realized that I may be in the same room with them but it didn't mean I was actually with them. I know that may be hard to understand, but the best way to describe it is the lack of connection with them. Whenever I go now I just feel a strong dislike for everyone there (all but one or two), and even then I don't talk to those people either. I don't grow at all and just come out negative and sad. I quit coming to this group about two months ago by simply not showing up, but one of the "leaders" texted me asking to come back. I came back the last two Mondays (today is cancelled for Vacation Bible School) and have decided again that it simply isn't worth it. Normally I would just not show up again, as I'm not at a job or anything formal where I have to give an excuse for my absence. I'm 22 and I can decide for myself if I want to go or not to a voluntary event. However, since that leader will probably text me saying that "We missed you tonight" I will go and text him saying I'm not coming back, but for you, OP, if you aren't close to a leader like that, you don't have to say anything. I'll pray that you find a new group as well as the others in this channel. It makes me sad. I live in Florida and we have a program here where college students from Oklahoma, Arkansas, Mississippi, Alabama, and maybe one or two other states come here for two months (May 22 - July 28) for some Christian sort of thing, I'm not sure the exact purpose. It's called Kaleo (for Oklahoma/Arkansas college students) and Outreach for the others. They come down here, work full-time jobs, go to church, and I think in their free time they have a mandatory booklet to fill out about growing towards God/growing up in general. Like I said I'm not exactly sure, but the one thing I've always noticed is that these people are the Christians we all want to be. They are friendly and social, always trying to get to know everyone at work and saying "Hello" or "Good afternoon" when they see you, they invite people to go to church with them or to talk about God, they talk about God with each other when working (if not busy) or on their lunch break, and they are just great people to be around. When I'm near these guys I feel like I belong with them because of how welcoming they are even though we are the ones who should be welcoming them since they're visiting for the summer. But that's the odd thing: The people at my churches (I go to a few) aren't like this. When I go to church I usually have no one to guide me around and I have to ask around until I find out where to go. Then here come a few college students for the summer and they're talking to everyone and inviting them to church and just have a fun time with everyone, making friends and growing spiritually in the process. I don't know whether to be happy that these people exist so I can strive to be more like them (and in turn more like God) or sad that I know so many local people who aren't like that. Sorry for the slightly off-topic rant, but I feel like it kind of related to this. =/
  9. Over the past week I have been wondering how strong my faith is and what's really important to me. I love God, I want to read the Bible and get further on in my walk towards God, I want a stronger faith and I love fellowship - at least I think I do. I've believed in God all my life but never really gone to church. I would go every now and then, but I didn't really start going with a want to be a better Christian until October last year after I realized I needed to get out and be around people more. Everything was going good until I saw a girl and developed a crush on her. About three weeks ago in my Sunday School I had to lead our little group (six to eight people) which was basically reading from a notebook about the topic we were on (something called the Ask series) and I really liked it. I learned by teaching and was involved, I felt like I really grew and I loved it. And I realized that the girl I liked, who is much further ahead of anyone in faith that I know (even people older than her, she's 18) might be impressed by me leading. So coming back to now, I'm realizing that while I love doing God's work and this or that, I'm scared that my motivator isn't to be a better Christian or to learn, but I'm afraid that it's really just for the girl. What I don't understand now is how much of what I do is for her rather than God and myself and how much isn't (if any at all). I feel like I only go now for her or to impress another girl in some way. I realize that I've never cared about myself unless I was in physical pain (or something of the sort) and all of this combined makes me wonder how honest I really am. If I'm not as honest as I thought I was or if I'm not as honest as I'm unaware I wasn't, should I keep going? I don't want the "go so you get saved then" answer, but I want a real answer of whether I should go with the way I am as of now when I don't even know what I'm doing. Sorry if this is in the wrong section and if anyone has a question about this then I'll answer. I'm 21 if it helps with this.
  10. Are mental hospitals as bad as the rumors say they are? Is there any sex or forced drugs/lack of therapy in them? I heard all they really did was put you on pills and then once you were good kicked you out instead of helping you through your problems. What was it really like?
  11. the sick

    Religion, Relationship, or Both?

    I think it's both a religion and a relationship, although it's much less a religion than a relationship. To me, Christianity is all about my relationship with God and learning about Him and reading the scriptures, trying to build my faith and get the Lord in my life. The definition of religion is "a particular system of faith and worship." While that describes Christianity in general, to actually be a Christian isn't what I would call practicing religion but more of being involved and strengthening my relationship with God.
  12. the sick

    Chick Fil A

    I didn't know you could be wheat intolerant.. I've been getting an upset stomach at everything I eat since June (yes, 4 months now) and I thought God just hated me or everything somehow had mik in it and I was getting problems from that since I'm lactose intolerant. This opens up a whole new world of possibilities.
  13. Just like the title says, I just want to see what everyone's favorite memories are. It can be a relationship thing, having a kid, something funny in school, anything. Funny, happy, just any sort of good memory you have that you like thinking about. Try to make it a few paragraphs long if you can. Really draw it out so everyone can easily visualize what you're talking about. Make it something people can do and come to this thread to read for hours when they're feeling down or just.. anything. EDIT: Here's mine. It all started when one day I was getting out of my programming class (Visual Basic) and walked over to third. I got there and just sat around waiting for the teacher to arrive. I'd recently gotten a Nintendo DS but didn't think I'd get a chance to play it in class, so I left it home. The bell rang, signaling that anyone arriving afterward was tardy. The teacher wasn't there. We sat around for a bit talking like we always do, as the teacher hadn't shown up yet. About ten minutes pass and we all stop talking and realize that she isn't there. No one is there. So we kept on talking. It was at this point that I'd wished I had bought my DS with me so I could play Zelda (Phantom Hourglass) instead of just sitting there in peace, but anything was better than having to do work or any other crap we normally did. Five minutes later, a woman walked in. Not the teacher, but a blond-haired woman. I don't know what the point is, but everyday she would come into the class and right by the front door on a small desk was a packet of papers that she would take every day. She would walk in, take them and walk out without distracting the class. And again, she showed up. Instantly, we all stopped talking and stared at her. There we were with no teacher in class, talking and laughing away and she walked in. She grabbed the papers, looked at us and smiled, then walked back out. There was silence as the door slowly closed. As the old saying goes, you could've heard a pin drop on the floor it was so quiet. Then we burst out laughing. It was a fun laugh and a day I'll always remember simply because of that one moment. A moment that has stayed in my memory for five long years, remembering what everyone's faces looked like. I still remember Pedro, Rob, Shane, Alejandro, a girl whose name I forget, Amanda, everyone. It was great. Then we all went back to talking =P And finally, with only ten minutes left in class we saw a teacher walk in and then some old guy. Apparently without being noticed the teacher's assistant had gone to the office and told them what was up, and they got someone. It could've been coincidence, I think the old guy was our substitute and was just late and happened to get there on time. They didn't realize we just didn't want to tell them anything. We were just congratulated on getting to work so quickly (practice test for some BS thing we have in our state called the FCAT). We did it for the last ten minutes of class then walked out. I heard a guy named Shane talking about how the period before us didn't have ANY teacher. Lucky. Oh well, I'll still always remember this for as long as I live. High school had some great times, and this was one of the best for me.
  14. the sick

    Presents for two friends

    I think I'll do that. I want to get them the gift card as well, but I don't know the kind of restaurants they have up there. Do you think a $20 gift card would work?
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