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elyza

Girl Forum Access (Ages 16+)
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    299
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About elyza

  • Rank
    Experienced Fellow
  • Birthday 04/06/1989

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  • Location
    Germany
  1. elyza

    Children of Divorce

    Thanks a lot for sharing. I've just sent you a PM. Would appreciate hearing from anyone else as well. God bless, Elyza
  2. Hi there, my parents divorced 8 months ago. Although I know that divorce is not the way how God recommends to deal with a bad marriage, I felt better about knowing there's an end and clarity for a new and better life for my mum. I had high desires for her to leave the old life behind by physically moving away from the place of local isolation where my father (claiming to be a Christian) placed her many years ago. I hoped that this "end" will be a new beginning between me and my father. Without doubt I thought that he'd contact me and we'd make appointments to meet up every now and then to keep our relationship going. But none of that has happened. And now, instead of my mum moving on (she's waiting and trusting in God for new directions, which may be a better way than me thinking of a quick solution), I hear that my father has a new girlfriend. And I really don't know how to believe and deal with this. I'd really love to hear from anyone who has gone through their parents divorcing as well, whether here or in a PM. Thanks for reading & be blessed, elyza
  3. elyza

    Confessions

    Dear xxxxx (real life), THANK YOU FOR THE WONDERFUL FRIENDSHIP WE HAD. I will not count the last 1.5 years I guess you understand. I've enjoyed greatly experiencing so many things together with you (uni, church, small group, CU, common friends, common soulache etc etc.). You have been a great listener & counsellor to me. Today I realized that our friendship is over. I guess it's actually very good that you put the finish line and not I. I am not heartbroken but I accept it as God's leading and I am SO happy that we can finish peacefully. You have changed a lot and I can't empathize with why you do or don't do certain things anymore. I know that you have so many struggles and insecurities within you which are the cause for these inward & outward changes. And I want you to know that I will continue to pray for you and I wish you the very, very best for your future. & most of all that you'll walk so closely with & committed to God. I don't know why you died your hair in blue, it really doesn't look good or friendly and I miss your elegant, female style from the past years. I really hope that you will find yourself very soon & also that God will give you a husband that suits you when you have gone through your personal struggles and that you may live happily ever after. It helps me to let go of you now and thanks for saying no when I asked you to meet. Did you know that I just asked God for his guidance concerning you & me, so shortly before we talked? I see him in this. If you are still praying for me, please pray that I may be able to accept the many changes he has for me in this new phase of life. That I'll see his guidance, walk into them carefree & be blessed & inspired by new friends, new ministries and the new work environment. Please forgive me everything where you think I have failed you. With much love: BE BLESSED.
  4. elyza

    college and sex

    Your future husband will ADORE you for having waited for him and honoring him by giving yourself only to him. At this point you can't imagine how much it will mean to you if you wait with sex until you're married. I'm 24 and a virgin and my Sweetheart is committed to wait as well and it gives our relationship and intimacy so much depth that there hasn't been anyone else before. And he is even older than me. I am so proud of him for waiting for me and I know if he or I hadn't, things would be / get difficult in our relationship cos at some point you will compare your partner to others or wonder about him doing that. We only managed to stay pure so far by God's grace & help. I am SO grateful to him for it. I don't judge anyone who hasn't managed because I've seen how strong the temptation can get. Your virginity is one of the greatest gifts you can give to your future husband. Would you want to withhold it from him? I'd stay on the safe side and wait til marriage. What do you think? Praying for you & be blessed! Liz
  5. Hey there, any recommendations for a good Christian book about relationship/courtship? I've already read Harris' Boy meets Girl and now looking for another one. I'd be interested in topics like phases of a relationship, physical boundaries, men/women differences, etc. Would be nice if it covers a range of topics... I'd LOVE any suggestions cos I'm going to order one such book this week!
  6. So would you take a trip somewhere with your bf/gf and stay overnight? If yes, would you draw some boundaries, like staying in different rooms - even if it's more expensive or inconvenient?
  7. elyza

    Physical Boundaries

    Wow thanks for your good & specific advice ladies Definitely helpful!
  8. If you've been in a relationship - which physical boundaries did you set? Which experiences have you made in trying to stay pure? What helped you & what made it more difficult?
  9. elyza

    Confessions

    Today my heart so longs for you to be saved. I just begged God to save you. Seriously. I thank God he gave me the opportunity to share the gospel with you and it is my prayer that everything that you got from me or remember about me points you to Jesus. Something I'd like to tell you (I didn't know it back then!), I'm sorry I said no. I mean as directly as I said. Cos I didn't know that in your culture it's impolite and I guess even disrespectful to just plain say "no". Today I even wonder how things would have gone if I hadn't said no. But I don't regret it. No matter how much I could have told you about Jesus, you were too much of a temptation for me. I don't think I could have dealt with it. I thank God he protected me. You know, every now and then I also think back to what you told me on the third day. And I am so touched by your honesty. Thank you so much for trusting me with this. I pray that after you'll get saved the Holy Spirit will give you the strength, the faith and the boldness to break with all lies in your life. I know you won't get truly happy grounding all of your life on lies. I pray that one day you'll see that living honestly under tough circumstances and being in harmony with God and people is so much better than to live in wealth because of lies. I long to meet you again one day as a Christian. When all is said and done, I want us to worship Jesus together in heaven. I want you to be there. Just wanted to let you know: I'm still praying for you. Still remembering the smile that crossed your faith when I told you that he loves you so much he died for you. I miss you.
  10. Concerning what you said about your two amazing weeks with God & then falling back into less exciting times - God recently told me to stop holding on to times that have been absolutely amazing with him & accept that it's not always the way it used to be. Be open to experience God differently, maybe sometimes even less intense than at other times (however, I'm not referring to accepting falling back into sin! so don't know if this applies to you atm ).
  11. elyza

    I Want A Relationship With God

    Hi Azile, it's great that you want to have a real relationship with Jesus! I think it's a good idea to pray and study the Bible, especially when you also ask the Holy Spirit to speak to you through God's word and to fill you. God promises you that he will come near to you when you come near to him (James 4:8 & several other verses). So maybe it's all about persevering. Sometimes we don't really feel that Jesus is close to us but we can still know that we are God's children and that he is close to us when we've been saved. When Peter preached to the people, they "were cut to the heart" (Acts 2:37) & asked him what they should do (to be saved) and he answered them: "Repent and be baptized (...)" - Acts 2:38. Is that something that you have done? Repentance includes to acknowledge your sin, confess it before God (if necessary apologize / make compensations to people), ask for forgiveness, receive God's forgiveness and turning away from it/not continuing to commit the sin but turning into the other direction & instead of continuing in it following God's ways. Is there maybe sin in your life that you are continuing in? If you believe in Jesus & have repented of your sin, have you been baptized yet? You might as well go ahead and get baptized in order to publicly declare that you belong to Jesus now and will live with him forever. Also to symbolically show the life change that definitely has taken place in you if you truly have faith in Jesus: Your old self has died as Christ died on the cross and in him you now are a new creation that lives and will be raised as he was raised to life by God. Also you might want to study God's promises & your new identity in Christ - all the privileges you have now and will have forever are mind-blowing! And do you know other Christians / are you part of a local church? Interacting with other Christians on a regular basis lets you see Christ as well because in many ways they are Christlike & you can experience his love by their loving you for example. or vice versa: You can pass on Christ's love to them by loving on them Also you might want to listen to some Jesus-centered preaching, I guess it's going to bring you so much closer to Christ (I can recommend Mark Driscoll & Paul Washer for this purpose ). When you pray tell Jesus what is really on your heart - like what really upset/worries you, what you're deeply joyful about or what you're afraid of - you can even speak to him about the questions you've mentioned here. The more personally you talk with him, the more you will probably feel him being close to you. I'm sure you'll have an amazing life with Jesus forever He loves you so much and also longs to be in close communion with you! Hope this helps in any way, feel free to PM me anytime. Praying for you & God bless!
  12. If it's not too upsetting for you, I'd also study the topic of death in Scripture. As in looking up the major passages about the topic and praying that the Holy Spirit will put faith in your heart so that you believe them with your heart as you read and ponder them. The bible for example often speaks about falling/being asleep with reference to death... such verses might reduce your fear greatly & strengthen your faith... All the best, praying for you, elyza
  13. I am referring to the submission of the wife to her husband... I realized that in my family line there are women who have been dictators in their marriage as well as women who have been doormats or exaggeratedly said slaves (by their own choice!) to their husbands. I don't want this to continue in my future marriage so I started thinking about and researching what "balanced" submission/surrendering to your husband may look like. What do you think is (not) submission? Girls: In what specific ways do you want to submit to your future husband? Guys: In which ways / how would you want your wife to submit to you? Would love to hear your opinions! [As stated in the title, I would not like this thread to be about disputing whether submission is right or not ;-)]
  14. elyza

    The Doctrine of Salvation

    Thanks for sharing :-)
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