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About eva0mwah

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    hey stranger!

    I joined this forum to express my concerns and thoughts about God as well as to meet new christians.
    (oh,and ask/talk about that subjects I am too shy to ask face to face).

    May peace be with you.
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  1. eva0mwah

    How should I deal with this?

    Hello there! First of all , let me tell you that your way of thinking is very mature! Second of all, how do you know that you have a low libito - do you have any sexual experiences in the past and you found out or you just think you have a low libito? Sex is something that once your start there is a huge possibility that you will want it more! Eitherway, I am pretty sure that they are many treatments and that one good doctor can help you. Maybe the treatment isn't that expensive and all you need is some natural hormones (there are some pretty natural pills out there like vitamins) that you may afford. If you are really thinking of marrying that girl, you both should have no secrets , so she should know. If she truly loves you and she is the right person for you she will wait. Best of luck!
  2. eva0mwah

    I thought I won this

    Ηey Boogles first of all, thank you so much for your honest reply. Knowing that lots of other people deal with those issues is a strong comfort. Since I met God, I really stoped masturbating cold turkey - as you said. I had such a "strong will" that I was able to do it. Now it looks very dificcult. I have this issue over here. If I keep falling into the same things, how does God see this? I really WISH and HOPED I could control my sexually manners or have a "turn on button" which I could hit only on my wedding night ,but I don't. God sometimes feels distance and hard to get, when I keep making the same mistakes over and over.
  3. Hello people.I am posting here because I am too embarrassed to ask someone from my near environment. So my story is pretty the same. I was a sinner, I had a sexual relationship with someone for almost 6 years and we broke up because I believed in Jesus. Life wasn't easy and defenitely this decision broke me into pieces. For the next 4 years I was feeling awful, thinking that I will never find someone to love, I will never get over him etc. After 4 years of general pain (difficulties with the church, home, broken heart, friends, physical pain etc) ,my life finally got better. God blessed me in so many ways I cannot even describe. I even met someone - a Christian guy - with who we are thinking of joining our lifes together by marriege. Now here is the issue. I am 23 year old and he is 20. I am working full time, next semester I am getting my diploma and I want to continue my studies by having a master. He has almost 3+ years to finish University, find a job etc. We are trying our best and we don't have intimancy relationship - only kissing. Sometimes it is very hard but we have set bundaries and we communicate pretty good so we have this working for us. I don't know if we can wait 3+ years to get married and have intimancy! I believe that this is too much waiting or even impossible. My problem is that when I was lonely, single and on my darkest, libito wasn't an option. Or at least I knew how to control myself because I had a greater relationship with God. Now that a met someone, my desires sometimes go out of hands and I fall into masturbation and sinnful thoughts. I am thinking about my boyfriend etc.. I believe that I shouldn't masturbate and that masturbation was one thing that I used to do before I met Christ, and now I am doing it all over again. I feel like a failure sometimes and very desperate that I do this. I thought I had win this but it turns out I was just hiding my desires. Any opinion? Sorry for bad english
  4. eva0mwah

    My Struggles With Faith

    First of all,excuse my english,this is going to be a long post. SO,dear I can totally relate.I have been actually to a worst situation than you.I didn't lose someone I loved neither I had to face with death.If so,i would have a much better excuse.I just drifted away from GOD due to life.Life is hard.When you wait for things you wish for and they don't happen,everyday duties etc made my heart like a stone. I used to be very angry with God and thinking of Him as a bad judge who isn't concerned of what I am going through.Day by day I seem to manage my anger and come closer to Him. Death is hard and painful for sure.You are going through a grieving period and your emotions are all over the place.Don't hold them back. Simply go to JESUS.Not to just the church,not to just people.Simply pray to God and tell Him how you feel.Tell Him why you are upset,your biggest fears&emotions.He already knows them anyway! In John,chapter 11 we see Mary&Martha who had lost their brother.The thing that gets me everytime is that Martha has a very strong faith in the power of God. 21 “Lord,” Martha said to Jesus, “if you had been here, my brother would not have died. 22 But I know that even now God will give you whatever you ask.” 23 Jesus said to her, “Your brother will rise again.” 24 Martha answered, “I know he will rise again in the resurrection at the last day.” 25 Jesus said to her, “I am the resurrection and the life. The one who believes in me will live, even though they die; 26 and whoever lives by believing in me will never die. Do you believe this?” 27 “Yes, Lord,” she replied, “I believe that you are the Messiah, the Son of God, who is to come into the world.” On the other hand we see Mary running to Jesus,falling on her knees and simply saying in tears : “Lord, if you had been here, my brother would not have died.” We don't see her having faith like Martha.We just see her deepest complain.And this is where Jesus wept.He wept.He didn't say ''Oh Mary see your sister how much she believes in me and blah blah blah''. Moments like these you don't need faith.You need the love of our Father to comfort you and take the pain away. The only thing you need to do is to ask for it.Don't set high goals.Even small prayings like ''God I am a mess'' it is simply enough. I wish that God will show you(and me) the light.
  5. eva0mwah

    Messy church

    Hey guys...well,I think we all have experienced this. I am in a very strange period of my life and my faith and everything seems just wrong.Lately I have seen all the bad&wrong stuff going on in my church and I get dissapointed and maybe angry.I have come to the point where I am very skeptical with everyone in my church because of some scandals I have heard of and I am pushing everyone away. True thing is that Jesus called me not to see the bad in other people or to judge.How can I do that?Sometimes it gets me to the point where I question even God. What someone can do in a messy church?
  6. eva0mwah

    heart like a stone

    Well,you are absolutely right.I just need to pick myself up again,collect my pieces and move on...
  7. eva0mwah

    Hormones going craaazy

    Well...I would like to just talk about an issue I am dealing with quite often. In the past I had sexual relationships but then I commited to God,asked for forgiveness and I am trying to stay pure till marriege. But sometimes,my hormones are all over the place.I do think about sex (not with a specific person though or at least I am trying to discipline my thoughts) .even when I am walking,I am having pictures in my head about my past sexual experiences which I hate . The question is this: Is thinking about sex wrong?I mean,is it natural,because of my age and my past?what do you believe God thinks about it? I don't find pleasure on thinking about sex or anything.I don't do it on purpose for sure.In fact whenever I catch myself doing it,I am shaking my head-even pinching my self for it.
  8. Aloha guys!One question for you: The latest days I am a spirtual mess.I spend so much time watching weird stuff on TV,killing time online doing absolutely nothing,haven't been around with christian people for a while,don't read bible,don't pray....My heart has turned cold and..I am going to say it...I am a bit bored lately. The good thing is that I want to change this situation and feel close to Jesus again.But i just don't bother.Every time I am making an effort,something else comes up and distracts me from loving and focusing on God. How can someone stay holy in this world full of distractions?Everyone and everything is ''screaming'' for things that aren't God's will and even though I want to follow Him with all my heart,I get tempted and just don't spend any time with Him at the end of the day.
  9. eva0mwah

    heart like a stone

    hello guys, i've seen something in myself that concerns me the most these days. My heart is growing cold and hard like a stone.Loss of faith and hope,a difficult-at least for me-reality,life is weird and in general I feel 70% of my time lonely and depressed. I've been a christian around 5 years now by God's grace,and most of these years are spent crying and struggling.They say that God gives you amazing pleasure and happiness and just to be honest,I don't see that. Yes,I have experience God's amazing joy but there are times where I sit in my bed crying to God and yet nothing happened.I don't expect a life full of roses,I know that Jesus never promised that. Anyway,my point is that I am a spirtually mess.I don't find pleassure in the Bible,I can't focus on what God wants or I can't do even the most simple things such as being polite with my brothers&sisters.In general,I am frustrated,disappointed and in doupts all the time. My heart has lost its desire for God,and no matter how HARD I push myself or how HARD I pray to Jesus to lift me up,things are the same.Self esteem is at the bottom too. well..enough said! Sorry for any spelling mistake
  10. eva0mwah


    alright.There I said it.I am jealous. I am jealous that a friend of mine got accepted to a University and I am not. The worst part is that I didn't even try it,I didn't even want that University but just the idea that my friend is going there drives me dissapointed. We are studying the same courses and she got accepted with an Erasmus program,at Paris.And I am stuck here.And I hate it feeling jealousy,really hate it. pff
  11. eva0mwah

    prayers for Greece

    Hey guys. I am asking you all to pray for my country cause things are really bad here. Europe is pressing for more strict policies,for more cut offs to saleries and more taxies.They have closed the banks,everyone can get only 50 euros out per day and soon these will be gone soon.Medicines and food are next. People are very angry and dissapointed,we are afraid for a civil war. Please,pray for my country and my family,may God give the best solution and give strength to greek people.
  12. eva0mwah

    the World and stuff

    I find that so true.A couple of years before I didn't have a hobby or I wasn't being active,so I spent my whole energy on thinking.My thoughts and temptetions were so heavy on me that I had terrible stomach pain because of sadness.This year I decided that I should fill my time with creativity and I am taking german lessons,hit the gym,studying even harder.I believe that God want us to be active in every way and enjoy what is given to us (our health,our free time,money etc) but we should be aware to put Him first and do everything in Jesus name. Praying and staying on track with God is number 1. Just sometimes I am too tempted to give up.When I lose my sight from Jesus and I look around I see that non believers don't struggle as I do,they follow their heart and most of the times everything goes great. BUT like I said I must focus more on God than anything.
  13. eva0mwah

    the World and stuff

    wow first of all I feel so relief that I am not the only one thinking that way.Being a university student,the temptations are many especially when you are alone and you had left so many things behind to follow Jesus. I am praying that God fixed my eyes on Heaven and gives me wisdom not only to reach for Him and His glory but also to enjoy every detail of my life and seize every moment He is giving to me. It is my desire to look and appreciate what I already have and enjoy the little things and not constantly thinking about what I WOULD have had. I have some crazy things as a young person (traveling the whole world,leaving in the countryside,roadtrips etc) that sometimes I kinda think ''wait!does God want this?''.And somehow I believe the answer is always a striking ''NO'' and that lets me miserable.
  14. eva0mwah

    the World and stuff

    Let me be honest. Sometimes I DO feel like worldy stuff can bring me pleasure and sometimes I DO feel jealously for non believers who do whatever they want to and follow their heart instead of waiting upon the Lord.My eyes decieves me and a little voice in my head says ''you will never be happy If you follow God,you will never have what you truly want and you will be in a constant battle where you will bleed to death '' Does anyone has the same thoughs as I do?and if yes how do you handle it?Cause it makes me so sad to the point where I can't go to God and leave my burden to Him.
  15. eva0mwah

    Living for Christ

    Living for Christ is denying who you are and what is your will and be 100% dependent on God.That is not easy for sure.The way I see it is like denying your will,dreams,thoughts,feeling everyday and live how Jesus would live through you.