T.O.W.R.

I'm not saying that I'm God, but people either don't believe in me, don't care if I exist one way or the other, or regularly misinterpret everything I do. Sooo..... Making friends sucks donkey.

They do. $7,000 dollars pays for my housing, food, and transportation for a year. Maybe I'll do it after I get my associates. That'll work.

Really considering dropping out of school and joining a volunteer group in Seattle. Like, I filled out the application entirely I just didn't send it in. But I really want to.

I just want to be able to sleep peacefully without dreams getting all weird. I've never been one to remember dreams. I've had instances where a dream will stick with me, but these are very few and far between. But recently I've had some really crazy dreams that I just can't shake. They're the types of dreams that are making it a little weird to be around people. Like, There's this on guy I know who I saw get terribly injured in a dream. It was gruesome almost too vivid and now when I look at him I see that. Or there is this girl who I dreamed was getting verbally abused and she was getting berated and bullied by everyone around her and now when I see her I see that. Like, I almost start to worry about these people even though I know it was only a dream. I'm probably making this sound so much more dramatic than it is, but it's just weird to have my dreams interfere even slightly in my everyday life when this has never happened to me before.

Hey all you crazy kids. My name is T.K.. I've been a member of CTF for 5 years. I've been a staff member, a councilor (back when we had those), a frequent forum game poster, a role player, a fairly prominent member for the last few years, and now a member who only logs on once every now and then. This isn't anything special, just the ramblings of a member who wishes he read something like this when he joined. I'd like to start by saying by saying that CTF isn't some miraculous answer to your problems. Many a member has joined and quickly left the forum because they thought they'd meet their new best friend who would somehow cure their loneliness, or some wise, sagely character will give you the answer to solving your anxiety, or easing your doubts about Christianity, stopping you from returning to the same old sins. This forum isn't a substitute for God. It isn't a free therapy website. It isn't your pastor, your parents, or your personal diary. It's simply a web forum. Now I'm not saying that you won't find some answers here, or a maybe a new friend, but these things take time and patience. Even when you get good advice on here, please hold it to scrutiny. Take time to really consider the advice given on the forum. None of us here are pastors. You'll notice that CTF isn't very busy. It's not and it hasn't been for a long time. Even when I joined 5 years ago, it wasn't near as eventful as it was in its prime. Most of the active members now are just old members who usually just get on when they're bored. That's not to say that it couldn't get better, but it's just not likely. I've watched as this place has decreased in web traffic steadily since I joined. If you're looking for a place to spend a lot of time, I'm afraid you'll find yourself even more bored to begin with. Dont get upset when you don't make best friends super quickly. I didn't really start talking to other members until my 3rd year on the forum. If you want to make lasting friendships, you'll have to wait it out like you would in any other type of setting. Dont take things personally. This is how you cause drama. And yes, it's just as stupid, childish, and petty as it is in the real world. Maybe worse. Some people are just jerks, some people just say what they mean, most of us here are just adults who really don't take the time to make sure our wording isn't "too offensive" because to us, it's just how we talk in the real adult world. It's just words, you'll be fine. Do not be surprised when you see people of different political opinions on here. Or when you find gay people on here, heck we had a transgender guy on here for awhile. He was a really cool guy. We've had a couple Wiccan members and even a satanist at one point. I'm not saying that you have to be all open armed and accepting, but be civil. Be kind. I want you new members to enjoy your time here. If it's for a few weeks or a few years, CTF can be a cool place. Just don't get angry when it's not.

I really didn't like Rogue One. Jyn was just laughably generic and other than the fact that everyone says that I'm like the Robot, I already forgot about most of the movie.

I know that struggle. The other day I had a migraine but also had plans to meet some friends I hadn't seen in months. So of course I went anyway. It was a terrible idea, but migraines won't stop me from enjoying my time with friends. If it's doctors orders though, you might try just calling her. I understand if it's a big deal though. Conversations in person can't be beaten.

I just can't get into MMO's. I think I might if I had a group of people to play with, but I don't. Soooo... Final Fantasy 14 looked amazing though.

How wonderful it is we serve a God that we can't comprehend. Eternity is daunting. I think that anyone who is totally comfortable with the idea is either lying or on something. But what I choose to see is that when we get to Heaven, we'll be too busy being with God that we won't have time to be concerned about eternity. Yeah, I don't understand eternity. I've only ever lived in a plain of existence that is bound by the construct of time. But as long as I remember that living forever isn't the point of Heaven (God is) then I usually end up at a peaceful point.

I saw so many movies this year that it's hard to remember all of them. But, The 5 that I remember the most are... Nocturnal Animals (This Movie is easily the best movie I've seen all year. Gut-wrenching, heart-stopping, eye-watering brilliance.) Storks (Completely different than the above. This movie is the funniest movie I've seen in ages.) Batman v. Superman (Or as I like to call it, The Wonder Woman epilogue) Kubo and the Two Strings (Not only is it beautiful, it's heart touching also.) Blair Witch (It actually scared me. Like, seriously. I jumped. I don't jump in horror movies.)

Nutmeg! I was just checking the forums randomly and saw that you came back. Im practically inactive on here but if some more of my fave oldies come back I might breath some life into these old forum walls.

I'm currently sympathizing with Yoda over a cold. I feel absolutely wretched and I have to be up in five hours for church. But at least it's almost winter here so my disease at least makes sense. Mentally I'm in a similar boat. I'm having a really hard time connecting to people at college and it's starting to wear on me. However I feel like I'm doing pretty well in the overall picture. Problems like this will eventually fade away because either the circumstances change or my mindset will so I'm just waiting for one of the two to change. Putting in effort with people but trying not care too much if nothing comes from it. Trying is the key word though. I am also rapidly losing weight despite my best efforts not to. I think stress can do that but if not it might some sort of disease that I should probably get checked out. On the bright side, my older sister is really starting to bond with my younger sister. And I get to see them in 2 weeks come Christmas break. Very exciting. I also got over 40 likes on my last Instagram post. Super trivial, but exciting none the less.

Not gonna lie, the only reason I logged in is because I saw that Noel was back.