I started to turn to god about 6 or 7 months ago and got baptized! I am dedicated to serve jesus and change my old ways. As a child I never received love from my father at all. I think this might be why I still might struggle with wanting a significant other. I have been through many heartbreaks and sadness in my past. I met him from my friends boyfriend around the time I was baptized and her boyfriend is an athiest. I found it crazy how they were both best friends. He comes from a catholic family and he started coming to bible study with me. I didnt find him too attractive but I saw some good in him. We almost fell into sexual sin and that is when I stopped everything because I was scared on the reason I was with him. I tried cutting him off at this moment because I didn't want that to happen although, he continued to attend my bible study and I would see him two days a week. So we remained friends for a long period of time. He doesn't stop talking to me at all. He shows interest for god but I don't want to be deceived. What if he's only doing that to try to get me? My bible study is in Spanish and he speaks English so I always translate for him. When I don't go because I can't he doesn't either. I'm not sure what to think about that when a lot of the other church members can translate for him. Recently Ive been feeling lonely. I also struggle with anxiety and I've asked god so many times to heal me. I still struggle with it but not as bad as before. It all hit me at once when I entered college again. My insecurities hit me and I went back to having feelings for him. We almost fell into sexual sin again but this time he stopped it early because he remembered how I felt about it last time. I am very confused about him. I'm not sure where he fits into my life. Im not so attracted to him and his personality is very immature. He shows interest in god but I don't want him to do it just because of me. We are both about to turn 19 and I'm only a month older. I feel like I can't have a real mature conversation with him or talk about the god because he changes the subject into a goofy way. I feel like he turns me away from god but It can also be my insecurity? What should I do about him? I feel like my emotions are going everywhere. I'm a new Christian so I don't have much knowledge on gods word. Maybe give some bible verses to back it up?