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Lust and Modesty: Girls vs. Boys

Lust and Modesty: Girls vs. Boys  

23 members have voted

  1. 1. Lust and Modesty: Girls vs. Boys

    • Yes, how they dress is a major factor in whether I will lust after them
    • Yes, but it's not a big factor
    • No
    • I'm a girl


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1. Are guys more "visual" than girls? In a way, yes. In a way, no. I mean, a girl seeing a half naked guy can drool over him. I mean, Hey, i like it when i see my boyfriend with his shirt off, but i'm just as attracted to him with his clothes on. So, i'm not sure lol.

2. Do guys struggle with lust more than girls? I think it's about even. I struggle at times, of course. It's a human reaction, no matter what gender you are or what gender you're attracted to.

3. How far is too far when asking for girls to be modest? I think if you're asking them to wear knee length shorts or shirts that make them look like grandma is a little bit crazy. I mean, i agree with Mr. Sugar. Tight is ok, but not *too* tight. And i don't even like seeing my 'sisters' in low cut shirts, or no bras, or shorts so short i can see their rear end.

4. Should girls care if they're being lusted after? Yes, they should. But if they are dressing appropriately and covering all the bases, and are still being lusted after, it's totally not their fault.

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1. Are guys more "visual" than girls? No, guys choose to lust or not lust over girls, its that simple.

2. Do guys struggle with lust more than girls? No, I believe that lust is pure choice, in most cases, for guys and girls.

3. How far is too far when asking for girls to be modest? Asking a girl to cover more than a guy or allowing a guy to cover less than a girl.

4. Should girls care if they're being lusted after? No, just because a guy is a pervert does not mean a girl should be concerned. If the pervert attempts to act on his lust, that is when a girl should care.

Celibacy and Abstinance are the best ways to stay pure from a sexual perspective. Lust leads to impurity and should be avoided at all possible times.

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1. Are guys more "visual" than girls?

About the same, you get really visual guys but you get really visual girls as well.

2. Do guys struggle with lust more than girls?

As above.

3. How far is too far when asking for girls to be modest?

As long as nipples and sex organs are covered, I think they should be allowed to wear what they want. Unless they're fat. They should be made to cover up.

4. Should girls care if they're being lusted after?

It depends, personally I'm quite a fan of it myself as long as they don't try anything, I have a boyfriend so nothing will happen. It's nice to know people find me attractive. :)

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1. Are guys more "visual" than girls?

I'd have to say that yes they are. Experts acknowledge that males are. This however is not saying that girls can't be visual though.

2. Do guys struggle with lust more than girls?

Yes, in general.

4. Should girls care if they're being lusted after?

I think they should.

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Now talk, using the aforequoted quotes, the poll questions, and the following subjects as a starting point:

1. Are guys more "visual" than girls?

In short: Generally yes.

2. Do guys struggle with lust more than girls?

Not overall, I don't think.

3. How far is too far when asking for girls to be modest?

Hmm . . . I have a feeling that beyond what scripture says on the matter, this is culturally determined. However, generally I would say anything beyond scripture and address this on a case-by-case basis instead.

4. Should girls care if they're being lusted after?

Eh . . . yes. Without something more specific, I'll leave it at that.

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1. Are guys more "visual" than girls?

I believe so.

2. Do guys struggle with lust more than girls?

I don't know. They're certainly more open about it.

3. How far is too far when asking for girls to be modest?

Knee-length skirt/dress/pants minimum, no sleeveless shirts, head covered whilst in church, chest and back covered, etc... is all appropriate. Even at the beach. I don't think women need to cover their heads outside of church, though.

4. Should girls care if they're being lusted after?

Yes, and so should men. We should avoid becoming occasions of sin for others. This applies equally to both men and women.

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1. Are guys more "visual" than girls?

Absolutely. I think we always have been, and always will be.

2. Do guys struggle with lust more than girls?

That's tough to answer, nowadays. Ten years ago, I'd say guys. I think scales are tipping towards even, though.

3. How far is too far when asking for girls to be modest?

Turtlenecks. :P

4. Should girls care if they're being lusted after?

I think they should. And I think guys should be more mindful, as well.

How often do you feel a strong temptation to lust after someone:

Not as often as most people think I do. Alot of the time I'm just enjoying their features. It sounds weird, but I like just looking at people. Their form, their stances, the way they walk. People simply fascinate me.

Do you masturbate / is it lust related / is it a problem?

It will always be an issue for me, but I try not to dwell on it. I find that the more I think about my problem, the more I struggle with it. But I'll say that if I'm masturbating, I am lusting.

Have you / do you watch porn?

I have before, but I don't anymore. I was actually forced to quit cold turkey, in a situation where there was no internet.

Does how a girl dresses affect whether you are tempted to lust after them?

Again, it depends. I find that some things girls wear will be more attractive than others. There are times where I'll lust after a girl in jeans rather than the girl wearing a short skirt next to her.

While I have really struggled with this in the past, I'm getting better about it, thanks to God... As cheesy as that sounds. D:

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1. Are guys more "visual" than girls?

I think so. This could be seen in the clothes that girls wear getting more and more revealing and the clothes that guys wear not. If guys weren't more receptive to visual stimulus when it comes to lusting, I don't think girls clothes would be getting shorter/skimpier as they years go by.

2. Do guys struggle with lust more than girls?

I think guys talk about it more, but I can't say without a doubt that girls don't deal with the issue just as much.

3. How far is too far when asking for girls to be modest?

What is too far is asking that no skin is to be shown and stuff like that. However, I think pants could be made a little less snug >_>

4. Should girls care if they're being lusted after?

I think both girls and guys should care if they are being lusted after. If what I wear is causing someone else to slip into sin, I would certainly be quick to try and stop that behavior.

After reading some of the quotes in the OP, I was a little disenchanted with how girls respond to this issue. Paul said that if something we were doing was causing a brother/sister in Christ to slip and fall into sin, we should stop doing that thing. I think this applies to clothing. If a girl wearing a mini skirt, pants that are *way* too tight or a shirt that shows a little too much cleavage is causing men around to lust after her, and this girl is a Christian, she should be quick to cover herself up to not cause her brothers to sin. But at the same time, the men should try their hardest to not let their eyes wander. I think this is something that both parties need to take an active role in. Girls should wear less provocative clothing as well as guys not trying to have their eyes set on girls that do wear those kinds of clothes. Also, if a girl is struggling with lust, she should try her best to deal with it, and the guys in the situation should wear clothes that are more modest. This includes possibly wearing a shirt at the beach.

Just my thoughts on the issue.

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Vega has a point. Now onto answering some questions as a male.

Do I masturbate? Yes, it feels good therefore I see no reason to stop. It also relieves stress and tension ( key for exam pressure ), and your brain dowses itself in Dopamine, what could be called the " happy " chemical.

I also think that people are using two definitions of lust, one as a verb ( masturbating ) and one as a feeling. As I've answered the first, the second one is mearly a thought, thoughts harm nobody.

I reckon it comes down to the individual in terms of how visual we are. I would not segregate the sexes into " Visual " and " Non-Visual ".

Modesty? I do not care what girls choose to wear, it's not my business, no skin off my bones. Their choice. I am not offended by ( nor can I see how someone could be ) clothing choice.

Most of the time, a guy/girl wont know that he/she is being " lusted " after, I assume you mean the emotional definition. Thus it is irrelevent. If they somehow become aware of it, why would that matter? You cannot judge because nobody has never lusted. You cannot take offence because in essence it is a compliment. Lust fuels our animalistic instincts to reproduce, thus they see you as a suitable mate. People seem to ignore this.

On a last note, I want to point out that I do not see lust as a " problem " suffered by guys. Hence it is not a " problem " that girls could " fix " by dressing modestly.

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