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CallMeMargot

How far would you go physically before marriage?

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I merely ask out of curiosity. it's interesting because everyones opinion is so radically different- like some people would go all the way on the first date, whereas someone else wouldn't even kiss until they got to the alter. I don't think I would go all the way until I was at least with someone for a while& we were pretty serious, but even then idk. but I'm curious what u guys think(:

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I'm waiting til I'm engaged to kiss on the lips, and til I'm married to make out/go farther.

^My standard answer. :)

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No farther than kissing before marriage. Pretty simple rule, easy to remember :P

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Kissing is what I do when I've gotten close with someone. Anything much further is something I'm saving for my marriage.

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I'm ashamed to say that I've slept with a lot of women in my life... However, as of today and being a changed person I feel like we 'should' keep all sex within the bounds of marriage, but I'm to a point where I have nothing to give so.. It's just whatever.

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This question is constructed relatively poorly. We should not be setting boundaries, we should be asking ourselves, how can I grow closer to God?

Our relationships should not be done out of a slight physical attraction or urge or puppy love, but out of a humility before God in seeking and desiring to fulfill His personal will to be united with another body to form one body, to worship God in a loving, caring and most importantly, God fearing relationship with our spouse.

When we consider our physical aspects of marriage, we have two things to consider, I would say.

1. Will my actions glorify God? Is what we are doing with the member of the opposite sex reflecting a relationship that God would be glorified from? Are my actions distracting me from my relationship with God? Am I idolizing the concept of physical activity, therefore placing God second? Remember, all things are permissible, but not all beneficial.

2. Marriage is not a piece of paper. Marriage, in the eyes of God, is a dedication to one person for life (remember, God hates divorce), which is 2 bodies uniting as one to bring God the greater glory, and is fulfilled by the physical act between the two, which signifies two bodies joining as one.

So my question, rather, would be this. Are my actions with the other member going to reflect a Godly relationship, and more so, will God be glorified out of this? If your answer is no, then I highly recommend you re-evaluate your position on what you are doing.

Unfortunately I have found myself in a position where what should be used to glorify God has been compromised. However out of those situations, I found myself on my knees in repentance, weeping for forgiveness, because my actions let down my guard, destroyed my honour and respect developed amongst my peers as a Christian, I failed to bring God glory, and I lead the other person into a position of temptation.

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This question is constructed relatively poorly. We should not be setting boundaries, we should be asking ourselves, how can I grow closer to God?

Our relationships should not be done out of a slight physical attraction or urge or puppy love, but out of a humility before God in seeking and desiring to fulfill His personal will to be united with another body to form one body, to worship God in a loving, caring and most importantly, God fearing relationship with our spouse.

When we consider our physical aspects of marriage, we have two things to consider, I would say.

1. Will my actions glorify God? Is what we are doing with the member of the opposite sex reflecting a relationship that God would be glorified from? Are my actions distracting me from my relationship with God? Am I idolizing the concept of physical activity, therefore placing God second? Remember, all things are permissible, but not all beneficial.

2. Marriage is not a piece of paper. Marriage, in the eyes of God, is a dedication to one person for life (remember, God hates divorce), which is 2 bodies uniting as one to bring God the greater glory, and is fulfilled by the physical act between the two, which signifies two bodies joining as one.

So my question, rather, would be this. Are my actions with the other member going to reflect a Godly relationship, and more so, will God be glorified out of this? If your answer is no, then I highly recommend you re-evaluate your position on what you are doing.

Unfortunately I have found myself in a position where what should be used to glorify God has been compromised. However out of those situations, I found myself on my knees in repentance, weeping for forgiveness, because my actions let down my guard, destroyed my honour and respect developed amongst my peers as a Christian, I failed to bring God glory, and I lead the other person into a position of temptation.

Ignore my entire post. When you free, babydoll?

I have a boyfriend. Sorry. :P

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Who the smiff even moderates this section?

It certaily isn't you any more... which, is regretable actually...

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Regretable? lolololol

What needs moderating? People having opinions? Not everyone is going to say, "WAIT TILL MARRIAGE" because we're not all the same. You'll get over us not being bots. Trust me.

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May I remind members of the 16+ Forum Guidelines, and the Statement of Faith, which applies in this section? I have just removed several posts which violated both of these by promoting premarital sex.

My answer is that "passionate" kissing or anything beyond that should be reserved until after marriage.

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No it is not, but I wouldn't take that job even if it came gold-plated.

Totalitarian moderation provided by Deeper... I'll pass.

Jokes aside, I find myself highly agreeing with you majority of your posts.

Yoda, little stiff on it don't ya think?

But like my previous post, I stand by what I stated 110%, and I highly discourage people from setting boundaries, but tackle things in regards to our relationship with Christ.

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Actually, serious point, I discourage people setting boundaries at where they feel obliged to set them, I know at my old school there was a lot of pressure on us to set strict boundaries. Do what you're comfortable with.

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We're not promoting premarital sex. We're having an opinion.

Um, this. While I understand that the idea of the free expression of sexuality might have upset certain delicate dispositions, I was not trying to promote pre-marital sex (though if I had that would have definitely been pure evil) I was just relating my own experiences. Come on guys. This is the mature section. Let's be mature about this. OK, perhaps this thread got a bit jokey, but that's no reason to remove posts that were meant as an honest contribution to the discussion. I know this is supposed to be a safe haven for Christians and I respect that, but not allowing people to relate their experiences on a board like this doesn't help anyone, doesn't exactly engender discussion, and it really doesn't make you look good.

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Thanks for your comments everyone.

But in the end, the rules say that advocating having sex outside of marriage violates the "16+ guidelines" and the SOF which is included in this section.

If you have further questions, PM me.

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I agree with all the people that say sex after marriage. The bible clearly states that any other setting is a sin (1 Corinthians 7:2 , Hebrews 13:4 )

Also, I disagree with tatty00 because you should absolutely set boundaries. You know yourself and those will be different for everyone, but none should include sex as okay. If you do not set boundaries then when you are "in the moment" you will think "This is okay, i wont go any farther than this." Then when things get even more steamy you will have trouble sticking to that. If you set a boundary and your boyfriend/girlfriend knows it then you can keep each other accountable, and if yours doesn't you should consider why they are in the relationship.. for you, or your body?

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Guest JAG

If you can back up having sex out of marriage with scripture then your opinion becomes valid I suppose...

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