Jump to content
CallMeMargot

How far would you go physically before marriage?

Recommended Posts

If you can back up having sex out of marriage with scripture then your opinion becomes valid I suppose...

You'd be surprised at how much I don't care.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Guest JAG
You'd be surprised at how much I don't care.

If you don't care to back up your opinions that's fine. If you're saying you don't care what scripture has to say on matters of morality than your faith is a skeleton.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
What needs moderating? People having opinions? Not everyone is going to say, "WAIT TILL MARRIAGE" because we're not all the same. You'll get over us not being bots. Trust me.

Stop assuming that because I don't see sex outside of marriage the same way you do I'm some how more of a robot than yourself. You don't even realize that the media, the movies, the music you love so much is one of the biggest factors to your moral world view than even your family life. You're in more chains than you realize they're just masked by the idea of being "individual" and "open-minded."

Secondly it's not opinions that are being moderated, it's opinions that lack any credible reasons to believe in them that should be moderated especially those that oppose the Word of God. Keep in mind, this is still technically a Christian forum. ;)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I recently had a discussion with someone about purity and courting. After that conversation, now I won't do anything with a guy that is going to cause me to lust or make me want to go further. Avoiding temptation is a good idea in general. If that means no kissing? So be it. If that means no hugging? So be it. I'm willing to do whatever it takes to keep my future marriage pure. I want to do what I can to protect myself, my future husband, and also this said guy and his future wife if it isn't me.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Also, I disagree with tatty00 because you should absolutely set boundaries.

You obviously didn't understand the essence of my point.

By grace our actions are led. If we maintain that our heterosexual relationship is ONLY for the purpose of glorifying God and keeping God as the centre of our relationship (rather than indulging into idolatry), then we won't need boundaries. Our actions will reflect the purpose and will of God and therefore our actions will be pure.

And if you cannot maintain to this perspective, then you shouldn't be in a relationship.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

At first, I planned to save myself til marriage. I never thought I'd do anything, that I'd be able to. But I fell in love fast and it all happened without a second thought. I am a very shy and conservative person, so it shocked me. But I made the right choice I think. I'm still with him, over a year later. He's the love of my life. So to answer your question, I waited ultimately, until I was in love. That's what dictated it for me.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I am amazed that this is even being discussed. Shows you how few morals and scripture knowledge the church has.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
If you don't care to back up your opinions that's fine. If you're saying you don't care what scripture has to say on matters of morality than your faith is a skeleton.

-still not caring-

Stop assuming that because I don't see sex outside of marriage the same way you do I'm some how more of a robot than yourself. You don't even realize that the media, the movies, the music you love so much is one of the biggest factors to your moral world view than even your family life. You're in more chains than you realize they're just masked by the idea of being "individual" and "open-minded."

Secondly it's not opinions that are being moderated, it's opinions that lack any credible reasons to believe in them that should be moderated especially those that oppose the Word of God. Keep in mind, this is still technically a Christian forum. ;)

Guess what? I don't have sex outside of marriage. =D Surprised?

-doesn't watch tv-

-doesn't watch movies anymore-

And all of my favourite music is in another language. ^_____^

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
I am amazed that this is even being discussed. Shows you how few morals and scripture knowledge the church has.

We obviously know it's against what is 'deemed' right and wrong, or else we wouldn't be stating that in our posts.

But God gave us a CHOICE, did he not?

So, think about that one.

Quit speaking like you are perfect. I'm sure you've done plenty wrong in your life, even knowing it was a sin while you did it.

That's being judgemental. Which, by the way, is ALSO a sin.

Why don't you freshen up on the Bible yourself?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

1 Corinthians 6:18-20 & 1 Corinthians 7:1-2

"Flee fornication. Every sin that a man doeth is without the body; but he that committeth fornication sinneth against his own body. What? know ye not that your body is the temple of the Holy Ghost which is in you, which ye have of God, and ye are not your own? For ye are bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body, and in your spirit, which are God's. Now concerning the things whereof ye wrote unto me: It is good for a man not to touch a woman. Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband."

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Obviously, the Bible states you should wait until marriage to have sex. That's not what's being questioned in this thread. What's being asked is how far you'd go in your own life. I'm not going to lie, I've had multiple sex partners in the past year. Do I realize it's wrong? Yes. Do I wish I'd waited like God intended? Of course. We all struggle and sin, this just happens to be the area I have most difficulty in.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Obviously, the Bible states you should wait until marriage to have sex. That's not what's being questioned in this thread. What's being asked is how far you'd go in your own life. I'm not going to lie, I've had multiple sex partners in the past year. Do I realize it's wrong? Yes. Do I wish I'd waited like God intended? Of course. We all struggle and sin, this just happens to be the area I have most difficulty in.

Well put.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Obviously, the Bible states you should wait until marriage to have sex. That's not what's being questioned in this thread. What's being asked is how far you'd go in your own life.

>:| Where were you earlier in this thread?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I would only kiss before marriage, anything other then that would wait till after marriage. I've never had my first kiss because all the people I know (that I would even have a relationship with) are very likely to just use me (I know that by also following God's word I will not be used or hurt in any way), and that is my biggest fear. It's a fear I have come face to face with multiple times actually. If the person loves me than they will wait until I am comfortable with it (only after marriage), and at this time I am NOWHERE near comfortable with it. So pretty much only kissing before marriage for me.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Does it matter when a couple in love has sex in their relationship if they are together for all their lives? They are not being promiscuous, nor are they breaking apart the union created by sex as spoken about in the Bible.

Personally, I am quite on the edge about this topic as well. My views have slowly shifted from being against pre marital sex to making one exception : life long love. When a couple celebrates their love for one another, and only one another, it brings joy to God. However, if two virgins marry, have sex, and then later divorce and remarry, this does not glorify God.

I guess the bottom line is still that no one is perfect though. So regardless of anyone's opinion, God always forgives.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

One word: communicate! Learn to do so effectively and not over emotionally. If your guy respects you, he will listen. If he doesn't, he has no business being your boyfriend. (however learn the difference between good communication and the kind of communication where whatever the guy says he is wrong, because the second kind gets nowhere fast)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I've already gone all the way. Do I regret it? No because my choices and learning experiences are part of who I am. I know the bible says to wait, but I've learned to stop putting myself on a constant guilt trip and learn from past decisions.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Does it matter when a couple in love has sex in their relationship if they are together for all their lives? They are not being promiscuous, nor are they breaking apart the union created by sex as spoken about in the Bible.

Personally, I am quite on the edge about this topic as well. My views have slowly shifted from being against pre marital sex to making one exception : life long love. When a couple celebrates their love for one another, and only one another, it brings joy to God. However, if two virgins marry, have sex, and then later divorce and remarry, this does not glorify God.

I guess the bottom line is still that no one is perfect though. So regardless of anyone's opinion, God always forgives.

The bible is very clear that sex is sin outside of marriage.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

To answer your question, I would go all the way.

Marriage today is a system in which two individuals sign a contract in order to receive extra legal and tax benefits. A long time ago people married because they were forced to, but today it is more often than not out of love. If you love a person, that's closer to marriage than all those people that were in it just for the sex or family scene. If you are true to your religion, you should respect marriage as something sacred that the government can't recognize, and in so never becoming legally married but instead seek a purely spiritual marriage.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
To answer your question, I would go all the way.

Marriage today is a system in which two individuals sign a contract in order to receive extra legal and tax benefits. A long time ago people married because they were forced to, but today it is more often than not out of love. If you love a person, that's closer to marriage than all those people that were in it just for the sex or family scene. If you are true to your religion, you should respect marriage as something sacred that the government can't recognize, and in so never becoming legally married but instead seek a purely spiritual marriage.

I wasn't talking about legal marriage. You can have a marriage ceremony without signing a legal contract. One of my dads friends did because he's a conservative and a libertarian.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I've never even kissed a boy and I'm 18. I don't see a problem with it. I am saving myself for marriage and I actually respect the people who court instead of date. It saves so many firsts for the person you marry. However, I would prefer to date, just because it allows you to meet new people to see what type of person you are most compatable with.

My answer as to how far I would go, I may kiss a boy before i get married, I may not. Nothing beyond kissing for sure.

I have 3 rules for dating.

1. The "below the waist rule." Anything below the waist is off limits. Don't even put your hand each others leg, it's a temptation to slide north. Nothing below the waist.

2. Dates are done in public or at home with parents or another couple around. There always needs to be people around. You don't live with/spend the night at the house of anyone you are dating until you are married to said person. Both points in this rule are to avoid temptation.

3. No displays of affection at church, church events outside of the church, or on church/youth trips. That is simply a personal conviction of mine, and I believe it is out of respect for the house of the Lord.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

×