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JoyfulFleur

How should I tell my parents?

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For awhile now, I've been thinking about telling my mom that I don't want to continue riding lessons. Not because I'm starting to dislike horses. That will never, EVER, be uttered from my mouth. I still love them the same. What is provoking my feelings towards this, is that I don't particularly care for the place I ride at anymore. My riding instructor is knowledgeable and good at what she does, it's just I really can not stand the sarcasm. I'll ask sincere questions and she'll say, "Well what do you think?" I think I never learned how to do that before....so perhaps you could kindly show me how? Her whole family is extremely sarcastic. I dread walking into her husband because of this. If I need help with something, he'll just shoot me down and sarcastically reply, "That wasn't that hard, was it?" The thing is, it's not too hard for him. He has 15+ years of horse knowledge under his belt, while I only have about 2 good solid years. (I've been riding for 4-5 years, but I didn't start building a real foundation until 2 years ago)

 

When we first found the place, I felt good about it and blessed to be there. But...I'm not feeling it anymore. Their comments are getting to me and are starting to make me second guess everything that I do. It's a struggle for me to suck it up and accept the fact that it's life.I can be a sensitive person, I know that. But this, out of anything, really peeves me!

 

I want to tell my mom, but she actually doesn't mind them. Naturally, my feelings will seem exaggerated and false. So I'm not sure how fast she'll accept the idea. Even if she did accept it, I don't think I would look for another place anyways. My 'I want to own a horse' dream is starting to fade away. I'd never officially stop riding forever. Eventually in the future I'll start back up. But as of now, I would rather spend my spare time taking art lessons. I've entertained the thought of art for a year now and I feel like it's something I would enjoy. 

 

I need advice on how to tell my parents(especially mom)! :/

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I'd just tell her straight up how you feel. What you've written here is actually very level headed and logical and, unless your Mom competes herself of is really invested in this idea of you taking lessons, I don't think she'll take it badly either. After all, art lessons are probably cheaper than riding lessons. XD

 

(and I say that jokingly as someone whose been riding off and on for about 15yrs)

 

I've noticed a lot of barns, especially show barns, can be stressful. They're perfectionists and can be downright rude sometimes. The goal is, first and foremost, to have fun and enjoy the experience and if your not then really your not going to better yourself as a rider anyway. If you wanted to keep with riding I'd say shop around, take a lesson or two at a few different stables and see if it 'fits' and if not? Well, thats fine too. Not sure of your age, but if you were wanting to get a horse I actually wouldn't reccomend it within a year or two of going off to college anyway. Love em. But the suckers are expensive... and having to sell your baby to pay tuition is just a wee bit heartbreaking (been there, done that). Your young, and by the sounds of it your not someone whose looking to be super competitive in riding so taking a break really isn't a problem. Explore. Try new things. 

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From past experience the best way is to come out with it, one way or another the true will come out. If you really feel that you want to postpone your riding lessons then you should let your mom know, I'm sure she'll understand if you tell her what's been happening and how you feel.

 

I am in no way an expert on this stuff but praying and asking God for assistance may be of some use as well. 

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If you'd like to continue lessons, have you told the people at the barn how you feel about this? They might not even realize that you're uncomfortable with the way they are communicating. You may talk with your parents the way the other posters are suggesting, but include the desire to find a way to have a mutual agreement with the people who work there if possible. Your parents may be able to mediate a conversation between yourself and the people in charge of the barn. 

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