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This is going to be long, so brace yourselves. And may be a little uncomfortable.

 

Well I broke up with my boyfriend last month. It was for a variety of reasons and I feel like the bad person. But I'll just make a list for you guys okay?

 

  • Twice when I was with him, he shoplifted. Putting ME in danger.
  • He always pressured me to s.moke (I know I'm not supposed to talk about that on here. Just let me list this)
  • He always pressured me to be sexual with him, which I've denied constantly. Gosh.
  • When we went out places, I always had to pay for things because he spends all his money on "stupid things"
  • One day he told me about some "disturbing" illegal things that he's done
  • I mean really really disturbing, enough to make you want to run away 10 miles from him
  • He's super messy, and I noticed that he started to become quick to anger
  • He wasn't Christian. He used to be but got rid of that title for some reason.
  • He listens to satanic songs, but claims that he's not that way
  • He never cared about the things I was passionate about: like my poetry. He would get bored and change the subject.
  • EVERYTIME he came over my house, he left it a mess
  • When I was in college this summer, he was upset that I wasn't paying much attention to him. But I was trying to do my homework.

These are some of the reasons why. I just feel like I was mean for dumping him. His exact words to me was "I feel no pity for you." and "If you want to leave me for something ike this, then feel free to step out."

 

I haven't heard from him in a month. So he must not care about me anymore. :( it's like I never mattered. It's always that way. I originally thought he was my soul mate (I know kind of cheesy), until I realized the things he was "in to."

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This guy was pressuring you to do things you didn't want to do, had no respect for you or the things you were passionate about and didn't seem to show much concern about you. I don't think you were wrong to dump him at all. I personally think that being with him any longer probably would have continued to put you at risk

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This guy was pressuring you to do things you didn't want to do, had no respect for you or the things you were passionate about and didn't seem to show much concern about you. I don't think you were wrong to dump him at all. I personally think that being with him any longer probably would have continued to put you at risk

It makes me feel mean though :(

But it also makes me sad that he didn't even care or try to fix things. He basically was like 'see ya don't wanna be ya."

This is a guy that I introduced to almost all of my family.

Edited by Silentflood

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It makes me feel mean though :(

But it also makes me sad that he didn't even care or try to fix things. He basically was like 'see ya don't wanna be ya."

This is a guy that I introduced to almost all of my family.

You weren't being mean at all. He was the one in the wrong, not you. And the fact that he didn't even care much about it just shows that point further.

I know it must be hard, but I think you did the right thing.

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You weren't being mean at all. He was the one in the wrong, not you. And the fact that he didn't even care much about it just shows that point further.

I know it must be hard, but I think you did the right thing.

Okay, thank you. I think I just needed to "hear" someone say it. I just wasn't quite sure how to feel. Although I broke up with him a month ago, it still bothers me sometimes. How I trusted him.

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Okay, thank you. I think I just needed to "hear" someone say it. I just wasn't quite sure how to feel. Although I broke up with him a month ago, it still bothers me sometimes. How I trusted him.

That can happen when you let someone get close to you, it can put you at risk. But don't let that stop you from finding someone else, cuz that's what makes it so special to begin with :)

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Telling someone "No." is never mean. If he made you that uncomfortable, was that inconsiderate and selfish, then it's good you let him go.  You don't need a hot mess person like that in your life. If they don't respect your "no" now, they won't later. 

From what I read, he's the best kind of person to avoid. All signs to point to "not good enough for you." and "sack of crap."

Someone like that is SO not spouse material, and I'm sure you, as a young woman, aren't interested in dating the same dude until you're 50. Especially not one who breaks laws and leaves messes lying everywhere. Those sorts of people only change via an act of God.

Edited by Boogles

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You did what you had to do. When someone is in a bad relationship, they need to get out ASAP. Googles is right. You deserve someone much better than him.

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You did what you had to do. When someone is in a bad relationship, they need to get out ASAP. Googles is right. You deserve someone much better than him.

 

 

Telling someone "No." is never mean. If he made you that uncomfortable, was that inconsiderate and selfish, then it's good you let him go.  You don't need a hot mess person like that in your life. If they don't respect your "no" now, they won't later. 

From what I read, he's the best kind of person to avoid. All signs to point to "not good enough for you." and "sack of crap."

Someone like that is SO not spouse material, and I'm sure you, as a young woman, aren't interested in dating the same dude until you're 50. Especially not one who breaks laws and leaves messes lying everywhere. Those sorts of people only change via an act of God.

Right.

I want someone who is a good influence, and that I can grow together with. Someone who will someday be marriage material. I'm not into the whole, "dating just for fun." thing.

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He obviously had no respect for you, or your feelings.

If there is no respect in marriage or in dating, how can it last long, and actually be happy?

 

You did the right thing. When people pressure you to do something you don't want to do, and when you say no, and if they get angry, then you need to step away from the person, because if they can't understand that decision and get angry, then I don't think they had ever really cared about you.

You deserve MUCH MORE than some stupid, hyped-up, drunk, low-life addict!  

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He obviously had no respect for you, or your feelings.

If there is no respect in marriage or in dating, how can it last long, and actually be happy?

 

You did the right thing. When people pressure you to do something you don't want to do, and when you say no, and if they get angry, then you need to step away from the person, because if they can't understand that decision and get angry, then I don't think they had ever really cared about you.

You deserve MUCH MORE than some stupid, hyped-up, drunk, low-life addict!  

:') I love you, thank you

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You TOTALLY did the right thing. That guy had no respect for you. I feel happy for you. That was a very strong thing to do, very few people drop jerks like that and move on for better in their lives. You're lovely, I know you will get someone 7,000 times better.

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You did the right thing. You weren't mean at all. He was the one being a jerk, not you. From what I can tell, all he cared about was himself, and not really about you. You don't deserve to be disrespected by a guy. You deserve better.

Edited by Delores Stariana

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Right.

I want someone who is a good influence, and that I can grow together with. Someone who will someday be marriage material. I'm not into the whole, "dating just for fun." thing.

 Then figure out a way to get involved with the right kinds of people, that's the key to finding good influences. Some colleges offer Bible studies. Look into other churches in your area. See if there are any house churches going on nearby. Get connected. ^_^

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You TOTALLY did the right thing. That guy had no respect for you. I feel happy for you. That was a very strong thing to do, very few people drop jerks like that and move on for better in their lives. You're lovely, I know you will get someone 7,000 times better.

 

 

You did the right thing. You weren't mean at all. He was the one being a jerk, not you. From what I can tell, all he cared about was himself, and not really about you. You don't deserve to be disrespected by a guy. You deserve better.

Thank you guys  :wub:

I must admit, that since breaking up with him, I don't feel as much stress. Now my stress mainly comes from school lol.

But none of it is from him. 

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 Then figure out a way to get involved with the right kinds of people, that's the key to finding good influences. Some colleges offer Bible studies. Look into other churches in your area. See if there are any house churches going on nearby. Get connected. ^_^

Yes, I'll definitely do some researching. I'm trying to force myself to be more social. I'm introverted :/

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When I was in college this summer, he was upset that I wasn't paying much attention to him. But I was trying to do my homework.

A needy criminal. Color me amused.

Get yourself a more religious and less law-defiant bad boy o/

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Yes, I'll definitely do some researching. I'm trying to force myself to be more social. I'm introverted :/

I'm introverted too. It's not forced after awhile. Just be friendly and people will return the favor.

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no offense at all, but don't feel pity FOR a man like that. He isn't gonna change and you deserve better than that. Don't lower yourself for a jerk like that.

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no offense at all, but don't feel pity FOR a man like that. He isn't gonna change and you deserve better than that. Don't lower yourself for a jerk like that.

 

 

I'm introverted too. It's not forced after awhile. Just be friendly and people will return the favor.

 

 

A needy criminal. Color me amused.

Get yourself a more religious and less law-defiant bad boy o/

Guys honestly, I shouldn't be sad at all.

But I can't help feeling depressed lately over it. Maybe I have too much time on my hands, I don't know.

But I'm home until Saturday and everything here reminds me of him. I just feel ...empty.

I don't want to said like I'm complaining or being annoying. It just still hurts a little because in the beginning I thought he was a wonderful man, until this other stuff came up 2 months later. Life was wonderful, I felt so happy to be alive and was very hopeful. I thought I found someone perfect for me. Now it's just another painful slap in the face that, hey, this will never last.

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Oh I know <3

 

I have had my share of tears over the same sort of thing. But no matter how much it hurts, we have to move forward... <3

:( :( :(

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:( :( :(

I can vouch for it, it is never easy letting go. Sometimes I still look back at that person. The songs I wrote for him, what I gave to him I will never get back, look and see his old accounts.

 

But I know now what he is. He is most certainly a liar, a deceiver...and he never truly loved me like he said he did. It is better to find new love. Don't harden your heart because of him. Someone special eventually will come to you and show you why it was the right thing to do. I think I've found that person and I think you will too one day Janelle. <3

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Wow. Yes, love, you definitely did the right thing. He has no respect for you, and that's not going to get him very far.

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I can vouch for it, it is never easy letting go. Sometimes I still look back at that person. The songs I wrote for him, what I gave to him I will never get back, look and see his old accounts.

 

But I know now what he is. He is most certainly a liar, a deceiver...and he never truly loved me like he said he did. It is better to find new love. Don't harden your heart because of him. Someone special eventually will come to you and show you why it was the right thing to do. I think I've found that person and I think you will too one day Janelle. <3

 

 

Wow. Yes, love, you definitely did the right thing. He has no respect for you, and that's not going to get him very far.

Thank you :)

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