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Mu_

My full testimony

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I hope you don't mind if I do a bit of copy & pasting from what I've posted previously:

Think of a man who is a devout Christian who works nonstop his entire life to provide not only for close family, but for distant family as well.

Well this man had what appeared to be minor health complications, he went to the doctor, and was hospitalized... before we know it, he was dying. It turns out he had everything under the sun wrong with his health. And his only fault in my opinion ever was that he didn't go to the doctor for regular checkups. So in 5 years, his body shut down.

I stayed back from this funeral, of my dad's. I basically rejected God. It has been just under a year since he died, and I am just now finding myself.

But how did I get here?

Recently before I joined this forum, I was a member of another forum where I thought I made friends with an admin. He started acted strangely though so I brought it up with him. So then he gets mad, tells the admin above him that I was breaking rules he was telling me when that wasn't the case at all, and I get banned.

The site was bad news anyway. So these kind of things happening were common.

I was recommended this site by a family member who was not only worried about me being upset about what happened, he also wanted me to be a Christian. You see, as an agnostic, my beliefs were growing darker, to magic and myth.

But it didn't stop there. A moderator here pointed me in the right direction, and then a member named Bishop is helping me strengthen my faith as well.

Also, I heard that "sick" song by Flyleaf at the age of 17 and really wanted to know who the singer was. I did multiple Google searches in the past and never found out. Well anyway, I was finding God again and I asked Him to give me a sign that He was real and I was on the right path. Well for years I had searched for that song, some 9 years, but definitely off and on. After hearing the mention of Flyleaf on the forum and not knowing what it was, I decided to look them up. And what do you know? After years of searching, I found that song just randomly.

I've been Christian again for about two or three days, and there have already been a couple of pretty big bumps, I almost broke faith today. But I am bouncing back, and have decided, I want to be on fire for God.

Edited by Mu_

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That's a truly incredible story. God works in our lives in so many different ways. Sometimes, He intervenes directly like in St. Paul's case. Other times He works silently through others. We don't know that this is God working through others at the time because a lot of us (I'm guilty of this) want that bright light to appear in the sky, or Jesus to appear to us directly. As we know, this doesn't happen often. The hardest thing is when we feel so helpless and alone in our faith that we feel that our Father is indifferent and doesn't care about us. Of course, this isn't true as you've recently discovered; God cares about us more than we will ever know. The important thing is to keep praying. When you feel like God isn't there, pray. Drop whatever you're doing if you're at home, and pray. Ask God to reveal Himself to you. Ask Him to change your heart so that you will see how He is at work in your life.

I know what it feels like to almost break faith. It's something I've been fighting this entire summer but I saw what I was doing wrong. I was looking for God in all the wrong places. I was looking for the consolations of God rather than the God of consolation. In other words, I was looking for the feelings that God inspired rather than God Himself. Some of God's greatest servants struggled with doubt. Blessed Mother Teresa of Calcutta was one of them. You aren't alone in this struggle, and you never are. You know, when God allows us to suffer like this, He is really at work. God turns our suffering into something truly beautiful. This hardship will pass, just trust that this is part of God's plan. You have told God that you want to believe and that you give your heart to Him. These "bumps in the road" is God forming you into the man He wants you to be. I've gone through this and see God in a completely different light, so I know what you're going through. I'll be praying for you in the meantime.

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That's a truly incredible story. God works in our lives in so many different ways. Sometimes, He intervenes directly like in St. Paul's case. Other times He works silently through others. We don't know that this is God working through others at the time because a lot of us (I'm guilty of this) want that bright light to appear in the sky, or Jesus to appear to us directly. As we know, this doesn't happen often. The hardest thing is when we feel so helpless and alone in our faith that we feel that our Father is indifferent and doesn't care about us. Of course, this isn't true as you've recently discovered; God cares about us more than we will ever know. The important thing is to keep praying. When you feel like God isn't there, pray. Drop whatever you're doing if you're at home, and pray. Ask God to reveal Himself to you. Ask Him to change your heart so that you will see how He is at work in your life.

I know what it feels like to almost break faith. It's something I've been fighting this entire summer but I saw what I was doing wrong. I was looking for God in all the wrong places. I was looking for the consolations of God rather than the God of consolation. In other words, I was looking for the feelings that God inspired rather than God Himself. Some of God's greatest servants struggled with doubt. Blessed Mother Teresa of Calcutta was one of them. You aren't alone in this struggle, and you never are. You know, when God allows us to suffer like this, He is really at work. God turns our suffering into something truly beautiful. This hardship will pass, just trust that this is part of God's plan. You have told God that you want to believe and that you give your heart to Him. These "bumps in the road" is God forming you into the man He wants you to be. I've gone through this and see God in a completely different light, so I know what you're going through. I'll be praying for you in the meantime.

Thanks so much :).

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This was written about a week ago. Since then, I have strengthened my faith, and decided what denomination I want to be a part of.

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Brooo thanks for sharing your testimony may God keep working with you and showing unbelievable things.

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thats so wonderful for you to be able to go through what you did and still accept Christ. That must've been hard, and I hope you continue with your faith and have the same burning desire to be with Christ. Good for you :D 

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