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KaitlynRocks

Modesty?

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I feel like no one ever talks about modesty anymore? for girls and guys? What does everyone thing is modest for a girl or guy to wear? In my opinion. I think girls should be wearing shirts that aren't low cut. with sleeves. and skirts that go below the knee. I don't get how pants that reveal every feature of our body is appropriate, even if you weren't Christian, How does everyone else feel?

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well I have a very traditional idea of modesty, but basically I feel there should be balance.

 

for instance if you want to wear those short shorts, wear a top that is like 3/4 sleeve and not low cut.

 

My personal idea of modesty is plunging v-necks are a no go. Nothing outside the house above the knee level. if you're wearing it to sleep or something whatever but outside is another thing XD no thongs. nothing see through. nothing that screams sexualization (for instance if you bought a pair of shorts with a giant kiss on the rear, well, you're technically asking people to look at your butt.) NO. BELLY. EVER. SHOWING. DELIBERATELY.

 

so yea. my stuff is traditional though and personally I don't even feel comfy in tank tops, but everyone's idea is different.

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I think that a tiny bit of belly is fine but only because it could be hot outside. Modesty is a good thing but obviously, not everyone uses it.

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well I have a very traditional idea of modesty, but basically I feel there should be balance.

 

for instance if you want to wear those short shorts, wear a top that is like 3/4 sleeve and not low cut.

 

My personal idea of modesty is plunging v-necks are a no go. Nothing outside the house above the knee level. if you're wearing it to sleep or something whatever but outside is another thing XD no thongs. nothing see through. nothing that screams sexualization (for instance if you bought a pair of shorts with a giant kiss on the rear, well, you're technically asking people to look at your butt.) NO. BELLY. EVER. SHOWING. DELIBERATELY.

 

so yea. my stuff is traditional though and personally I don't even feel comfy in tank tops, but everyone's idea is different.

You can't see thongs because of pants?

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I am also quite traditional. I don't think going outside the house with anything above the knees is appropriate, no tank tops, and no low necklines. Oh, and nothing see through and no belly showing and nothing super tight that shows every curve etc.

Edited by Delores Stariana

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The human body is a beautiful thing. Why worry so much about covering it up and living up to societal expectations? There are more important things to worry about. Just have common sense about it all and you'll be fine.

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The human body is a beautiful thing.

You seem to be implying that there is no necessary category for private beauty, only public. Why?

Why worry so much about covering it up

Covering and uncovering, secret and revelation, mystery and discovery, curiosity and surprise--all of these are essential to the pleasures and joys of human existence, in no place less than sexuality. The highest joys of love and lust are found in finding out, in coming to know the object of affection. There are no secrets more delightful that those shared between lovers alone.

That, of course, is merely one positive, sexual case for public modesty. There are many others, including negative ones, which deserve consideration.

and living up to societal expectations?

Because effective societal expectations are exactly what make society function. Societies without common binding expectations dissolve as they lose the common grounds which make them a society in the first place.

There are more important things to worry about.

There are also more important things to worry about than brushing my teeth. That does not imply I should neglect brushing my teeth, or be excused for not doing it.

Just have common sense about it all and you'll be fine.

This is probably true, actually, but never assume that what makes sense to you is common sense, because few people have been taught it these days.

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I personally go around shirtless when I can even in public but I'm a guy so XD

Modesty isn't fully about dress, but intentions.

 

basically, you're not being very modest in heart if you're going shirtless to try and attract women to lust over you.

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I worked at a camp where the dudes were required to wear shirts while swimming for a similar reason. 

 

I'm not really a stickler for rules, rather, I try to dress just a bit more modest and a bit more formal than the situation requires. For example, when swimming, I will often wear a two piece swimsuit (think tankini) and short shorts but for just general summer wear I wouldn't wear something that reveals my midrift. I don't usually wear tank tops, but if it's hot and the situation is casual I might. I don't generally wear short-shorts but, again, if I'm swimming I will. My dresses are usually fingertip length at least unless I only wear them out dancing in which case they might be less. I wear skinny jeans but leggings require a tunic or dress-like shirt. Low cut shirts arn't a thing for me but I'll wear a v-neck with a nice tank underneath and I don't feel bad about it. I dress up to work. I wear makeup but not much. 

 

All things in balance. 

 

I've gotten wolf-whistles and cat calls coming out of mass and I've had someone chastise me for wearing running shorts in front of the blessed sacrament and eventually I decided that you just can't win. I follow my gut, but I let myself enjoy fashionable attire to a degree. I'm not trying to stand out usually or draw in looks, but I take a certain amount of pride in looking well dressed and attractive. I aim for polished over "hot". Put-together over lust-inducing. 

 

And it works for me. 

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Modesty isn't fully about dress, but intentions.

 

basically, you're not being very modest in heart if you're going shirtless to try and attract women to lust over you.

I'm not tryin to do that. It's just comfy

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Because effective societal expectations are exactly what make society function. Societies without common binding expectations dissolve as they lose the common grounds which make them a society in the first place.

 

 

That's the good stuff, right there. 

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I worked at a camp where the dudes were required to wear shirts while swimming for a similar reason. 

 

I'm not really a stickler for rules, rather, I try to dress just a bit more modest and a bit more formal than the situation requires. For example, when swimming, I will often wear a two piece swimsuit (think tankini) and short shorts but for just general summer wear I wouldn't wear something that reveals my midrift. I don't usually wear tank tops, but if it's hot and the situation is casual I might. I don't generally wear short-shorts but, again, if I'm swimming I will. My dresses are usually fingertip length at least unless I only wear them out dancing in which case they might be less. I wear skinny jeans but leggings require a tunic or dress-like shirt. Low cut shirts arn't a thing for me but I'll wear a v-neck with a nice tank underneath and I don't feel bad about it. I dress up to work. I wear makeup but not much. 

 

All things in balance. 

 

I've gotten wolf-whistles and cat calls coming out of mass and I've had someone chastise me for wearing running shorts in front of the blessed sacrament and eventually I decided that you just can't win. I follow my gut, but I let myself enjoy fashionable attire to a degree. I'm not trying to stand out usually or draw in looks, but I take a certain amount of pride in looking well dressed and attractive. I aim for polished over "hot". Put-together over lust-inducing. 

 

And it works for me. 

this is a lovely answer to this conversation.

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I really don't get what the attraction is towards wearing as little clothing as humanly possible. I really don't. I've seen teenage girls go into Christmas and Easter Mass, some of the holiest nights of the year, wearing next to nothing. They had these dresses on that went so far up that it was ridiculous. When it comes to casual clothing, I think women should dress in a way that is respectful to their bodies. This means no low cut tops, no yoga pants (in public or outside of, well, doing yoga), no belly showing either and shoulders should be covered. Now, for church, I think women should wear a dress that goes all the way down to knees and that covers the shoulders. Men should wear a suit and tie, but that's just my opinion.

I say this because the body is sacred. Women can bear life in their bodies and that is such an incredible gift. All life is sacred, and so is the ability to bear life. In the Catholic Church, we cover things that are sacred. The altar always has a cloth on it except for Good Friday where that's part of the liturgy to leave the altar bear. Some more traditional churches cover the tabernacle where we keep the Eucharist because it's sacred. The ability to bear life is sacred. That's why women should actually wear clothes, especially to church.

Sorry about the rant, by the way. This is just one of my pet peeves; people not dressing respectfully for Mass.

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I'm basically agreeing with Jesusismyticket and Marely over here. A little added thing, I'd think short skirts worn outside the house would only ever be appropriate if you wore them with really dark leggings or jeggings. And even then that has limits.

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I personally go around shirtless when I can even in public but I'm a guy so XD

Modesty doesn't just go for girls....Guys need to be modest too.....Its not just Girls not wearing tight short things....when guys go around shirtless...yes it is attracting girls attention....but girls shouldn't be staring at guys and lusting over them,

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Modesty doesn't just go for girls....Guys need to be modest too.....Its not just Girls not wearing tight short things....when guys go around shirtless...yes it is attracting girls attention....but girls shouldn't be staring at guys and lusting over them,

Very good point, even though guys aren't pressed to look "sexy" as much as girls are, modesty should still be important for both genders in their walk with God.

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I think modesty for women is both, not displaying your body in a sexy way and simplicity. I think girls should wear skirts (Deuteronomy 22:5 is my reason) not pants. I also think that tight and mini skirts are just as immodest as pants. The skirt should go on or below the knee and you should watch out for the opening on the back that many skirts have nowadays. Wear shorts under the skirt just in case and be careful not to show your panty line. Shirts should be loose and if its tight, wear a cardigan or sweater over it. Your bra should not be showing and if it does because of the shirt, wear an undershirt. The neckline should end a couple of inches before your cleavage so that it doesn't show and you can bend in peace. The armpit should not show because in any occasion something else can show if you are not careful. The sleeve should at least end past your armpit (prefirably between the elbow and armpit). No make up; just wear the beautiful face God gave you! A ring, a brooch or a hair accessory should be the only jewelry you hear. As for simplicity, don't wear anything that can grab people's attention. Show as less skin as possible yet wear as less as possible. Even if you wear all that ^^^ nothing compares to the modesty within which is humbleness, sincerity, and a loving and caring heart for the Lord.

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I think girls should wear skirts (Deuteronomy 22:5 is my reason) not pants.

This is what I find most problematic in your whole entire post. Two problems:

1) We are not under the OT Law.

2) Pants are not "man's clothing." They are unisex.

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I am very much into modesty. I don't think shortie shorts should be sold. And I think women should wear a dress or skirt to church... And not the length the teen girls at my church wear, which is super short. I think you should at least go JUST above the knee. I can hardly find a modest dress in the stores, they are all so short! Even in the girls section, it is crazy how short they make dresses for little girls... So I buy my stuff from Mikarose, modest brand :D

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I am very much into modesty. I don't think shortie shorts should be sold. And I think women should wear a dress or skirt to church... And not the length the teen girls at my church wear, which is super short. I think you should at least go JUST above the knee. I can hardly find a modest dress in the stores, they are all so short! Even in the girls section, it is crazy how short they make dresses for little girls... So I buy my stuff from Mikarose, modest brand :D

It is sad how that is. I remember when my now ex boyfriend took me to his winter formal, I ended up buying this 'granny' looking dress because it was the only modest one there...it kinda upset me. Like, we're pushing this immodesty on all our teens and children as well. Make you wanna learn how to sew and make your own stuff.

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It is sad how that is. I remember when my now ex boyfriend took me to his winter formal, I ended up buying this 'granny' looking dress because it was the only modest one there...it kinda upset me. Like, we're pushing this immodesty on all our teens and children as well. Make you wanna learn how to sew and make your own stuff.

I think I am going to :) XD

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I think modesty (as in dressing appropriately) is very important in today's world for both men and women. Modesty is so much more than not showing off your body. It's about showing respect for yourself and others around you. It shows that God is first in your life, and you don't have to change yourself or your morals to attract the opposite sex. Once your heart is aligned with God's then You will want to do what is pleasing to Him. And showing respect for yourself, and putting Him first is very pleasing to Him.

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If you wouldn't wear it in front of your dad.

 

Don't wear it at all.

 

ie: short shorts, super low cut shirts, super short tight dresses, super short skirts

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