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Marley

Official CTF Dumb Jokes, Goofy Puns, and Silly Pictures Thread

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Just like it sounds. But! Keep in mind, this is not the "Official CTF Cynical Jokes and Overused Memes Thread" I'm looking for generally positive, clean, and goofy type laughs. 


 


1. Keep it CTF appropriate.


(No language, no sexually explicit jokes, etc..)


 


2. Avoid jokes that are mean-spirited or attacking a particular person or group.


I'm looking for fluffy or even just bizarre over cynical. Keep it friendly please! 


(Blondes, LGBTQ, Democrats, Republicans, Atheists, Christians, Muslims, Hillary Clinton etc. etc..)


 


3. No Memes. Funny pictures are fine but please avoid any memes.


To be honest, I'm just kinda over them. 


(Dodge, Unpopular Opinion Puffin, Condescending Willy Wonka, Good Guy Greg etc. etc.) 


 


4. If you're gonna post, include something funny. No "Haha!" or whatnot without contributing.


 


5. Have Fun! 


 


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Edited by Marley

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I've got a question, and it might sound dumb, but I'm not very techy and not very hip to all the new jive, if you know what I mean, so here goes nothin'. Isn't a meme just a funny picture with a funny quote, slogan, saying, etc. on it? Like what you posted above? I might be mistaken, so please pardon me if I am, I very well might just have a misconception of the meaning of the word.

 

Why did the runner quit the race against Big Foot?

 

Because he couldn't face de-feet!

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I've got a question, and it might sound dumb, but I'm not very techy and not very hip to all the new jive, if you know what I mean, so here goes nothin'. Isn't a meme just a funny picture with a funny quote, slogan, saying, etc. on it? Like what you posted above? I might be mistaken, so please pardon me if I am, I very well might just have a misconception of the meaning of the word.

 

Why did the runner quit the race against Big Foot?

 

Because he couldn't face de-feet!

 

Haha I like that joke. Here's mine:

 

 "What did the mama buffalo say to the baby buffalo when it left for college?" 

 

"Bye-Son!" 

 

I'm defining "Meme" as "A humorous image, video, piece of text, etc. that is copied (often with slight variations) and spread rapidly by Internet users.

 

I may be wrong in my definition, but when I think "internet meme" I think a picture which is a reproduction of a "source" funny picture. Someone posted the original, and then people reused it over and over and over again. Like this one. How many copies of that have you seen around? Nothing against em, I'm just personally not a fan. I'd rather see something somewhat original. 

Edited by Marley

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What do you call an imaginary color?

A pigment of your imagination.

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I've found this website to have lots of good, clean jokes: http://jokes.christiansunite.com/

This is one of my favorites:

 

An American magazine held a competition, inviting its readers to submit new scientific theories on ANY subject. Below are the winners: 
       
      5th place (Subject: Probability Theory) If an infinite number of rednecks riding in an infinite number of pickup trucks fire an infinite number of shotgun rounds at an infinite number of highway signs, they will eventually write the complete works of Shakespeare in Braille. 
       
      4th place (Subject: Bio-Mechanics) Why Yawning Is Contagious: You yawn to equalize the pressure on your eardrums. This pressure change outside your head unbalances other people's ear pressures, so they then yawn to even it out. 
       
      3rd place (Subject: Symbolic Logic) The Chinese are technologically underdeveloped because each of their alphabetical characters represents a whole word or phrase, rather than a single letter. Thus they cannot use acronyms to communicate technical ideas at a faster rate. 
       
      2nd place (Subject: Newtonian Mechanics) Deforestation may cause earthquakes, tidal waves, or even the total destruction of our planet. Just as a figure-skater's rate of spin increases when the arms are brought in close to the body, the cutting down of tall trees may cause the Earth to spin dangerously fast on its axis with disastrous results. 
       
      Winner (Subject: Perpetual Motion) When a cat is dropped, it always lands on its feet, and when toast is dropped, it always lands buttered side down. Therefore, if a slice of toast is strapped to a cat's back, buttered side up, and the animal is then dropped, the two opposing forces will cause it to hover, spinning inches above the ground. If enough toast-laden felines were used, they could form the basis of a high-speed monorail system.

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A vulture boards a plane carrying two dead raccoons. The flight attendant says "I'm sorry, but we only allow each passenger one carrion. 

 

Two mice are chewing on a film roll. The first mouse says "I think the book was better." 

 

I was wondering why the ball kept getting bigger and bigger..... and then it hit me. 

 

What did the janitor yell after he jumped out of the closet? ......... "Supplies!" 

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Those made me giggle.

Eh the dumbledore one might be in poor taste. Just let me know...

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Edited by JKAY

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Why does the hack Gothic writer always say please and thank you to the editors handling her manuscript? Because she's such a Poe-lite author.

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The horse though. XD This is so dumb why is it so funny to me? 

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What do you call a alligator in a vest?

A investigator

what do you call a cow with no legs?

groundbeef

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