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illyannam1

I know it is wrong and I need to fix it

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Hello I am 15 years old. This year I started to get involved in relations with boys my age. Everything was going okay until I started to do sexual activities with them. I am still a virgin but I need guidance on how i can stop this so that I can stay one. I know that my religion says its wrong and I feel very dirty for doing it. I have stopped seeing my most current boyfriend. How can I change for the better?

 

 

 

 

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 I have two words for you: Set. Boundaries. 

Start with your heart. The first boundary should be in regards to beliefs. Who ya datin'? Are they spiritually compatible? will they encourage you to grow in your faith or will they egg you into doing things you regret?  Seek friendships with people who have the same moral standards as you and use this as your "dating pool". If they don't have the same standards or higher, don't date them, don't entertain romantic thoughts about them. This is where knowing someone for a long time or dating a friend comes in handy. You should know where they stand before getting romantic. 
Also, your relationship with God needs to be right. This is the most important relationship. When this one is flourishing, everything else seems to fall right into place. 

Next is inter-family relations. Whatever familial boundaries are in place need to be respected until you are independent. Do your parents approve of whom you're dating? Is your date following parental guidelines? If not, you may need to cool the relationship a bit. Save for the rare controlling type, most parents are down with their kids dating. If they don't like your date, you'll want to step back and try to see things from their perspective. Parents were teens once too. If there's anyone's mistakes out there to learn from, it's your parents!


Last is physical boundaries.  
Most people don't get carried away with brief kisses and decent hugs or even cuddles. Those are fine, and even expected in a relationship. Where things get a little too hot is somewhere between the home plate and "first base." (some say first base is kissing, urban dictionary says making out and Frenching). Figure out where your personal line is and don't cross it. Respect yourself.  Romance shouldn't make you feel dirty. 
Any guy who thinks your line is "stupid" or "prudish" is not worth your time. Also, make it a point to go on dates in public places, bright areas and avoid places where you could get too cozy. Follow your curfew.


And to stop feeling dirty, repent, ask for forgiveness, carry on. It happened, but God forgives and the fact that you asked for helps shows that your conscience is still operational. Kudos! 

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Yeah! Boogles is right.

In addition:sit down, don't rush,and determine what you want for your life.Most people feel like dating and doing all of that because that is what is usually done at our age,not because it's important to us personally.

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