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The Corrupt a Wish Game

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(Don't apologize for your British-isms. I find different dialects interesting!)

Granted, but the meat of your hamburger is undercooked. 

I wish my muscles were not so sore.

 

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Granted, you're muscles no longer feel pain. As a result, you have lost your sense of touch altogether

 

I wish I could sew

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Granted, but your life has been extended indefinitely. Same personality for eternity with no change, sounds kinda dull 

 

I wish for a bowl of soup

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Granted! The soup... is your least favorite soup and is years expired. 
 

I wish people would put out better transformation-related content on YouTube.

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Granted, but every video is 8 hours of unskippable, unrelated stuff, then five minutes of really good content

 

I wish for a big house

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Granted, he only speaks in Gaelic. But very bad Gaelic, so translations don't work well

 

I wish for a comfy bed

 

 

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Granted, but pennies have been discontinued for being too low value.

I wish I was better at praying.  

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Granted. You are now the definition of "so heavenly minded you're of no earthly use" and just pray all day.

 

I wish for better drawing tools

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Granted, your emotional support system now consists of three monkeys who regularly scream at each other but like, give you a banana when you're feeling bad

 

I wish I had a monkey

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Granted. Now they understand you so well you can't keep anything a secret, even gifts you want to surprise them with.

I wish I could fly.

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Granted, they're made of wax, which Icarus proved to be a less than ideal material

 

I wish for fame

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(I didn't say I used wings ;))

Granted, you now have fame. In fact, you have so much fame that you're known around the globe and never get a moment's rest from the paparazzi (or pepperoni, one of the two) and people feign being your friend to try to get access to your money or to get fame for themselves.

I wish these wishes weren't corrupted.

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Granted, the wishes no longer have strings attached. Now, whatever you wish for is exactly what you'll get and you're living an easy life full of granted wishes. And a life without struggle or opposition is almost no life at all

 

I wish for a donut

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